Watching Bobby and Kitty skating on the pond hurts much more than I initially thought it would. Sure, I’m jealous and frustrated, but to actually see him flirt with her so openly – he could beat me into a bloody pulp and it wouldn’t hurt so much. I don’t really think while packing my things, but once I reach the hall downstairs, I feel eerily calm.
I’m not surprised when Logan steps into the hall and asks, “Need a lift, kid?”
He attempts to look casual, but I know he sees this as fulfilling his promise to me. “No.”
“Where you goin’?” He eyes my bag, my coat, and I don’t even have to actually say it.
Instead, I look at him, my heart in my eyes. “You don’t know what it’s like, to be afraid of your powers. Be afraid to get close to anybody.”
He frowns, and I know he doesn’t like hearing me talk about this. “Yeah. I do.”
I sigh. “I wanna be able to touch people, Logan. A hug. A handshake.” I swallow, and his eyes darken. “A kiss.”
He steps closer to me, and I half expect him to ask if I’m doing this for Bobby, but then he says, “You really enjoy feeling sorry for yourself, don’t you?” I stare up at him, dumbfounded, and he takes my silence as confirmation. “Look at yourself, Rogue. You think you have it tough? Remember that fancy diplomatic thing I had to accompany Storm and the Professor to?” I nod, still unable to formulate a reply to his accusations. “There was this guy. His name is Black Bolt. He can never, ever speak, because one word from him is enough to evaporate a whole city.”
I have to look away, because what he says is true. There are people out there who have it worse than me. Lots of them, actually. But can’t I feel sorry for myself anyway and am I not allowed to want to change my situation?
“Marie, look at me.” His voice is soft, but it allows no argument. I meet his eyes, dark and earnest. “Do you trust me?”
I smile lop-sidedly. “Of course I trust you, Lo-“
I don’t get any further because suddenly his lips are on mine and his hand is in my hair and his other on my face, and it takes me a full 5 seconds to actually process this information. And then it takes me another 10 seconds to realise that nothing is happening.
He pulls back and I stare at him. He smirks. “Gotcha.” His hand is still on my cheek, and all of a sudden the drain starts and he pours into me. He jerks back, but he’s still smirking at me.
I dropped my bag when he kissed me, and as I take an involuntary step away from him, I stumble over it and land on my butt, knocking my head into the door.
He crouches down next to me, his face serious. “Guess you and the Ice Prick didn’t try that in a while, huh?” I can’t do anything but swallow hard because it’s true, and he grabs my hand and pulls me to my feet. “Marie, you’re stronger than this. You don’t have to throw away a part of yourself. You can learn to control it.” His grip on my hand tightens. “Like I learned to control myself.”
And then he pulls up my sleeve, and my eyes widen because no one is supposed to know, but of course he’s not fooled. He traces a thumb over the already closing cuts, quickly enough so that my charged-up skin doesn’t react, and looks at me.
“And you can learn to control this.” I look away, but he puts a hand to my head and makes me face him. “You will never cut yourself again, do you understand?” I nod before I have a chance to think it through, and he gives me a little smile. “Good.”
Picking up my bag, he leads me back to the stairs, and I can’t help but stop there and look at him questioningly. “Why are you doing this? Why don’t you just let me make my own mistakes?”
He quirks a grin, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “I care about you, Marie. A great deal. And if this thing is permanent... I’d lose you, and I’m not... That’s not something I can accept.”
I smile shakily. “That’s probably the sweetest thing anybody ever said to me.”
He grins again, but this time it’s a true grin. “Don’t tell anybody, though. I got a rep to lose.” He winks at me, the tension that filled the hall draining away. “Sleep tight, kid.”
I watch him go, the hall falling silent. “You too, Logan. You too.”