Valentine’s Day had come and gone, the heartache that had been around the whole school hadn’t been helped by the arrival of Jean. She’d appeared one night after the kids had gone to bed, the scream that had erupted from Scott had almost seared his ears. Everyone had flown out of their rooms to see Scott reaching out toward what he thought had been a delusion until his fingers had touched her. The embrace and the soft sigh that had echoed around the room had made him uncomfortable, he’d ushered as many nosy kids out of the way as he could. It’d wait till the morning and it had, when he’d seen Jean sat with Scott he’d been shocked but he’d avoided them both keeping himself wrapped around Marie.
She needed to know he loved her, wanted her and ‘The Conversation’ had begun. It mainly revolved like this, ‘Do you love me?’ he’d answer ‘Yes of course I love you.’ She’d reply, ‘You're sure you didn’t make a mistake?’ he’d gotten annoyed the first time and he’d snapped at her, the look of hurt had made him feel lower than a snake. He’d learned after that first instance that she needed reassurance that he loved her now that Jean was back and her gifts had increased in power. It was hard living in a house with two goddesses he supposed and all she had was his baby growing inside her, as if that wasn’t enough to make her the centre of his world.
He’d caught her talking to Jean one morning, they’d been a little stand-offish to start with and it had been a week before they’d actually looked each other in the eye. Now they looked as if they were getting along pretty well, he hung back to see what was going on and he tuned out the rest of the room to pick up on their conversation.
“He loves you, you know.”
“Yeah I know but it’s hard to be second Jean. I never wanted to be second, not with Logan.” He saw Jean smile and reach out to Marie, touching her skin on her face, the simple act making Marie’s scent spike.
“Oh honey you never were, if anyone was it was me. You didn’t see his face when he thought he’d lost you at the train station and in the blackbird, he looked like Magneto had pulled him apart. Rogue you were always there first honey, ever since you got here. I was just an easy distraction, after all he couldn’t go chasing you back then could he? I know Charles is open minded but we have to have policy to protect the kids we care for.” Marie dropped her head a little and held the warm hand on her face.
“I’m pregnant Jean.” Jean just smiled and pulled her to her, holding her tight. Her face lit by the news and she finally saw him stood by the doors.
“Dad’s watching,” Marie turned her head and saw him, releasing Jean she held out her hand to him and he walked over to them both. Seeing Jean release her and step back to allow him to hold her.
“Congratulations Logan, Rogue, how far are you along?” Jean looked happy for them both and she smiled warmly her gaze resting on Marie.
“Two months, still getting sick in the mornings but hey I’m not alone there,” her grin was wide as she hugged Logan and he felt the smile erupt over Jean.
“Really? Well, well looks like I was right then.” The smile that covered her face made him curious and he fell for it.
“What did you say?”
“Just that you love her more than you say Logan, I’ve only seen it a couple of times myself but it usually happens with people who have a very deep bond, usually developed over years.” Jean looked at the smug grin cover Marie’s face as she hugged him. “Thing is they usually go through the labour too,” the look of shock that crossed his face must have been spectacular because Scott caught the look and came over grabbing Jean in a fierce hug.
“What’s got Logan all riled?” Marie and Jean just looked at each other and laughed it was Jean who eventually answered.
“Just the prospect of being a father Scott, that’s all.” She saw the look of annoyance spread across his face as she revealed his weakness to Scott, something he didn’t want anyone to know about. Quickly feeling her mind brush across his and place a thought in his head ‘Don’t worry Logan if I have my way we won’t be long behind you.’ She winked at him and he laughed out loud, pulling Marie with him as they left the rec room.
The rest of the week had been uneventful, now that Jean was back she’d taken over the main duties in the med bay, leaving Hank to continue his research. Hank was rarely seen in the dining room or at breakfast now that Jean was back, everyone went on with life including him and he’d almost forgotten the promise he’d made to the large man. He’d almost finished the cabin now, it was coming together well, the walls were nearly finished and he had enough lumber to do the roof. The only thing that was hindering him was the lack of manpower; it had been Xavier who’d asked about his progress and Logan had told him about the lack of help what with everyone training. Xavier had told him he’d send him some help later that day and he hadn’t even thought about it he’d just gone out as normal, kissing Marie goodbye as she continued her studies.
Going out to the site he’d been working on the rest of the lumber cutting it into the shapes he needed to lock it together when he’d heard someone coming up the hill along the path. Stopping his work he’d looked over and had seen Hank walking up the slope, his body hunched and legs pushing hard against the incline. The sight of Hank making Logan think of a bear who’d just woken from winter his body a little stiff and his movements unsteady. Moving back from the edge he got back to the work he was doing, knowing that he’d be up here soon.
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Hank watched the man work, the chips were flying everywhere when he topped the rise, the house was coming along and the size of it was almost a shock. Logan had been working hard over the last couple of months, the walls were upto the second floor and the start of the stairs were already in place. He just watched the rise and fall of the axe in Logan’s grip, the sound of the log being hit echoing around the valley, the sight of his back working making Hank wish he’d never come. But Charles had asked him to help out, seeing as he could lift heavy loads and knowing that Logan wanted this finished before the summer so they could both be settled before the baby came.
Sighing Hank walked over to the front of Logan and made sure he saw him, moving round he caught the eye of Logan and saw him wink at him. The look on his face making Hank blush as he followed the rise of his chest with the rise of the axe above his head. A thin sheen of sweat covered him and he could smell the cleanness of it, there was nothing else like it in the world, a mixture of everything that Logan was. Breathing it in he knew why most of the female population of the school followed Logan around after he’d been to the gym.
It was the scent of man, nothing else even came close to the richness of it, if they could synthesise it they’d be millionaires. Yet even that would pale next to the original, it was like the difference between silver and gold obvious when you put the two side by side. There was no one else like Logan and Hank shuddered with the thought of it, that he could only ever borrow him that he’d never be his entirely. Lost in his own thoughts he never saw Logan look up and walk toward him, burying the axe in the log.
He’d smelled Hank as he’d come over the rise, he was hurting something was wrong with him. Feeling Hank’s eyes on his back as he worked, knowing that there was something odd going on if Xavier had sent him up out here. Xavier knew about their meetings it was hard for him not to know, it’s not as if he could ignore the mental blasts that had come his way from the two of them when they were together. After their last encounter Xavier had asked him the equipment in the gym was safe and he’d given him a little smile that had reached his eyes. He’d answered yes and it would get better too if he had his way but then again he wasn’t he one who ordered it.
The words were all coded but they both knew exactly what they were talking about, they were talking about Hank. If Xavier had sent him up then he knew he needed him but Hank would leave it until he’d be bursting with need before Hank came to him. Looked like Xavier had headed him off at the pass and was giving them both the ‘all clear’. When Hank had moved round to face him he could see it in him, the nerves were twitching and his fingers were fiddling with the large buttons on his coat. His breath was pluming slightly in the cool air and Hank was wishing he hadn’t come up here. Smiling he saw Hank’s gaze drift away and he sank the axe into the log and walked over to the big man.
Hank came back to himself when he felt Logan standing next to him, the sure strong hands were undoing his coat and he felt the cool air rush in as Logan opened it. Snuggling himself underneath the warmth of it, Hank felt his heart soar as Logan buried himself inside the large coat, rubbing himself in Hanks fur. Drenching Logan in his scent hearing his own throat rumble as Logan rubbed against him, setting his nerves ablaze, crushing him into his large body and holding him. Logan popped his head up and caught his gaze, “Long time no see Hank, where you been? Did you get lost down there in the labs?”
Hearing the deep tones of Logan’s voice say his name and the welcome he felt from him made Hank ache for more than he could have. His own voice managing to answer after a few seconds, “Been busy, doing research trying to find the genome keys for suppression. It’s tiring but worthwhile, now Jean’s back I can do more.” Logan just nodded into the broad chest, his fingers roving over the fur of his back making Hank’s blood go south.
“How you holding up? What with Spring and everything?” Logan waited for this answer looking for the tell tale hint of a lie, when Hank didn’t answer he had to ask again. “Hank you going to answer me?” He pulled back so he could see the large mans face and caught the scent of salt in the air, “Hank?”. Putting a little distance so he could see his face, he saw the tears in his eyes and the tracks that had run down his muzzle. “Hey what is it?” Concerned now he moved out of his embrace only to find himself held still by Hank’s large hands on his bare arms.
“Don’t leave me, please Logan don’t let go.”
The ache that he felt from Hank was huge and it rang through him, he hadn’t seen him at all in the first two weeks of the month. When everyone else had been planning where to go, what to do with their partners, Hank had a partner of sorts but he had to share them in secret. All of it crossed his large open features and Logan sighed, “Ahh shit Hank, cum here.” Dropping his head he let Logan hold him as he knelt in the soft earth, the ground still cold from the winter but warming with each day that passed. “It never occurred to me, I’m sorry.” Knowing that from Hank’s point of view he was the only thing he had, the only release he had from the frustration that ate at him, the only one who could cope with his touch, with his needs.
“Why didn’t you just tell me Hank?” Looking down at the large head buried in his chest and feeling the rumble of his answer go through him.
“I can’t just sit down next to you at dinner and say ‘By the way Logan fancy a roll with me after dinner?’ I can see Rogue really happy about that one, never mind everyone else.” Hank knew that Logan never expected him to do that but he’d hoped that Hank would’ve come to him sooner.
“Hank all you had to do was grab me when I’m alone.” The gaze that met his was full of hurt as he answered.
“Yes I would have if you had been.” Throwing his mind back through the last three weeks Logan did a count of the times he’d been alone and found that he hadn’t been. There’d always been someone or something around or in the room with him, planning for the cabin, Marie and the valentines plans, the arrival of Jean. There had been no time, looking through the memories he saw Hank around for the first week then he hadn’t seen him till now. Looking at Hanks face he dropped his own to meet Hank’s, cradling it gently in his hands Logan dropped his lips to Hank’s whispering just before they touched. “I’m alone now.”
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The kiss was warm and soft, it never ceased to amaze Hank how gentle Logan could be, how soft he could be. He’d seen Logan training in the danger room and seen the punishment his body could take so it always surprised him when he was so tender, so gentle. The kiss didn’t last and Hank needed so much more, “Logan,” his own voice was harsh with need and he saw the smile settle on Logan’s beautiful face as he heard it.
“Hank I can only give you a part of me and even then only for a while. You’ve gotta understand that or I can’t do this. I care for you Hank I really do but I belong to her. Is that enough for you Hank? Can you deal with that because if you can’t I’ll go.” Hank saw the depth of feeling he had for him, that he didn’t want to hurt him by holding out something Logan knew he couldn’t give and he didn’t want Hank to think he was. This was release, this was mating, animalistic and raw not love and it never would be not while Marie was alive and even after maybe not.
Hank nodded, “I understand Logan, I want you but I’ll deal with it.”
“I know it’s hard Hank but that’s how it is, how it has to be.” Hank buried his face in Logan’s warm skin, rasping his tongue across the surface and hearing the intake of breath as he did so.
“Logan let me taste you, let me feel you come in my mouth.” The image ran through Logan’s mind and went straight to his groin, holding the huge head as he sucked his dick knowing he’d be close to those teeth made him shudder. Lifting Hanks face to his, taking his mouth roughly and feeling Hank growl with the need it opened in him.
“Back of the far wall, move!” he pushed Hank away as he fought to control his breathing, checking the lower slope for movement for any activity at all. The afternoon had just started but there were no kids to be seen anywhere, smiling he sent out a quick thanks to Xavier knowing who was keeping their attentions elsewhere.
Hank moved like an automaton his steps slow and measured as if he had all the time in the world, but his muscles twitched revealing the tension just beneath his skin. Hank passed around the back wall of the cabin out of his view, not out of his scent range though and Logan was picking up the excitement that was flooding from Hank. Logan could hear Hank shedding the large coat and listening to his breathing becoming laboured as he turned the corner himself. Hank was crouched against the wall of the cabin his body unfettered by clothing and he could see his erection pointing skyward, smiling he couldn’t help but comment. “Glad to see me huh?” The amber gaze that raked over him was enough to sending his own blood soaring.
“You have no idea Logan.” Walking over to the big man he put himself in front of him, his groin at Hanks eye line.
“So tell me,” he saw Hank swallow and his hands twitch toward his hips. Smiling he moved out of reach his eyes finding the amber heat yearning for him. “Not until you tell me Hank, tell me every thought then you can touch me, then you can have me.” Hearing a low growl grind out of Hank he just smiled at him and stood his ground, defeated Hank began.
“When I see you with her I want to be there with you, I want to fuck you; lose myself in you. Have you all to myself, to touch whenever I want, however I want.” Logan moved closer to him, picking up one large hand and rubbing it over his hip, keeping it just far enough away from his groin. Hank bit down a frustrated whimper as Logan looked down at him, his large erection already weeping clear fluid. Knowing from his scent that he was close already, the images of him naked and under him were running through Hank’s mind. Bending his head close to Hank’s ear he whispered to him, “I’ll let ya in on a little secret Hank, you wouldn’t be the first to fuck me.” He took a quick look at the large man’s face, seeing his eyes tight shut as he brought the image of a naked Logan being fucked into his head. “Want me to tell you?” Hank nodded quickly sharply and he could see the slight buck of his hips as he spoke to him.
“Was the first year I was in human company after waking up in the middle of nowhere with no idea of who or what I was. I’d wander round the logging camps looking for work, anything to bank roll me for a while. Well I went to one place where they had a cabin and a cook, cook got injured and I got the job. Spent the winter cooking and fucking, there were no other choices out there Hank, your hand gets boring very, very quickly. No man out there ever lets things get that bad that they end up with them fucking a moose no matter what tales you hear, nah Hank they just fuck each other. What with me being the new boy, well I was like a belle at her first ball, not that it always happened at night. Hell no, first time I was washing dishes, stood in front of the sink like a little housewife. Next thing I knew there were hands on my belt and a dick pressing into my ass.”
Hank groaned at the image and Logan let his hand creep closer to his own burgeoning erection. “Want to know what I did?” Hank just gripped him tight as Logan ran the large hand down the front of his jeans, “I just stayed still Hank, the hands weren’t hurried. He took a good long time to get me ready for him Hank, think he used some cooking oil I think but he did a good job slicking himself and me up. I even remember the tone he used to tell me to relax, soft an warm just like I was a young girl he was fucking.” Hank’s other hand was on himself now and he was stroking slowly, trying to lengthen the pleasure his teeth gritted tight as he slid his rough palm over his flesh.
“You know what Hank, I never did find out who he was. Just his hands that were wrapped round my dick as he fucked me, at least he gave me a reach-round better than the rest of the fuckers. I’ll never forget that stretch though Hank, the slide of him and the feeling it gave me, that I was wanted, needed by someone. He called me beautiful when he came and there’s nothing like that feeling Hank, of being filled from the inside and I know why I loved to see women’s faces when I used to fuck everything that was living. I wanted to see that pleasure in them, knowing I was giving them something, something I loved to feel.” Hank’s hand was speeding up and he could sense the closeness of his climax. “Fuck me Hank.” The words had barely left his lips when he saw Hank stiffen as the shudder went through him his body reacting to the images Logan had given him. Opening his amber eyes he saw the need shining out at him as he stroked his still erect penis, “Suck me Hank, then if you want to I want you to fuck me, long and slow. I want to feel you come inside me.”
Undoing his belt Logan allowed Hank to undo the buttons of his jeans, freeing his erection to the cold knowing it would soon be warm again in Hanks mouth. The need was almost palpable in the cold air as Hank moved closer to Logan’s erection, Hank’s nose taking in the scent of him and finding Marie’s mingled with it. A sharp spike entered Hank’s gaze and Logan noticed it. “You don’t like it, clean it away Hank, make me yours.” He didn’t need a second invitation and Logan felt himself propelled forward into the heat and warmth of Hank’s mouth. Unable to keep his voice quiet Logan gripped Hank’s fur tight, “AHH! Fuck yes! Suck it Hank I want to feel the back of your throat when I fuck you!”
Hank was lost in sensation, his nose finding every last piece of mingled scent, his large rough tongue scraping away every last trace of her until there was nothing left but Logan. Suckling on Logan’s rigid length, tracing every vein with his tongue, feeling his slim hips buck into his mouth forcefully. Listening to Logan’s harsh voice filled with passion, knowing it was his own body that elicited the responses he was getting from him. Having to hold Logan steady as he slid his length inside his mouth, slowly sucking along the length of him, grazing him past his teeth and scenting his arousal each time he did it. A dark thought running through his mind, Hank shifted the already weeping length in his mouth, making it brush over his sharp carnassal teeth. Logan growled loud gripping his fur tight at the back of his head and pushed himself deeper, almost cutting himself on the sharp ridges of his molars. Repeating the action as he felt Logan’s body tense, voice loud and harsh as he plunged into Hank’s mouth, “Fuck me Hank, I need you! Christ I need to feel you inside me, tell me you’ll do it.”
His first spasms ripping through his body as Hank gripped his hips tight and sucked hard, swallowing everything. Tasting the salty fluid that flowed from Logan into his throat, making him purr with every pulse that came from him. Holding Logan steady as he caught his breath, Hank still sucking him, his rough tongue cleaning him, Hank’s eyes the colour of burning gold, releasing Logan to the cold air Hank looked into the soft hazel gazing down at him. Lips slightly parted, skin flushed Hank could scent the need pouring from Logan, without a sound coming from him Hank stood.
Fluid in his movement he turned Logan to the wall of the cabin, pulling the denim down and away from him in one movement. A submissive sound came from Logan’s throat and Hank growled in his ear, pressing himself against him, pushing him into the rough hewn surface beneath him. The voice that spoke to Hank so unlike his normal tone Hank stopped to listen to it, it was softer, needy as it reached him, “Please Hank, I need you.” Pulling Logan’s hips back to his own groin, Logan felt the hard ridged length resting against him, nestling between their bodies. Logan bucked back and upward, telling Hank what he needed from him, what Logan expected him to do knowing he was showing him something no one else knew about him.
That he needed to feel vulnerable, to feel loved by something bigger than him, one of his first good memories had been sex with a man bigger than he was. Logan was keening now, rubbing himself against the ridged length, his hands gripping the wall in desperation as he moved. The sight of Logan’s body shifting against the dark wood burning itself into Hank’s memory, taking hold of his hips and bringing himself up and into him. Feeling the resistance of his body at first, the sharp intake of breath as he smelt the pain in the air until he moved inside him.
The grip of his body around him was like nothing else feeling Logan move into each stroke, pushing back with all his strength, his skin rubbing against the sensitive fur of his body. Looking down over Logan’s shoulder he could see his erection almost painful to watch as he shifted inside him, each movement he made inside the tight channel of his body making it swell further. Feeling Hank’s head on his shoulder Logan whispered to him, “Touch me Hank, please touch me.” His hazel eyes snapped open and for a moment Hank saw the love he had for him, riding high in their clear gaze as he spoke to him. Reaching around easily Hank gripped Logan tightly, just starting to move his hand in time with his body when Logan fell apart around him. The sound and scent of his release driving Hank into a frenzy of lust, lifting Logan easily Hank pulled his lovers feet off the ground using Logan’s hips, getting underneath him properly as he fucked him, hard.
Logan’s voice filtering through to him through the haze of passion that filled him, “Yes, harder Hank, faster, god please faster.” Just hearing Logan’s voice need him, sent Hank further over, roaring with the animalistic urges that flowed through his large frame he pounded into the body he held to him. Scenting blood and feeling it trickle down his groin knowing it was Logan by the scent of it, knowing he was hurting him but he didn’t care, the rush of endorphins inside his body demanded he finish. Chasing the blinding peak he felt Logan grip him, sending him over the edge into the release he’d sought, bellowing out into the woods around him. A sound unlike any other, loud enough to scare creatures miles away, loud enough to be heard in the mansion.
Logan could feel Hank release inside him, filling him with warmth, mixing with the blood that was flowing from him, pain was there but it was tempered with a fullness he hadn’t felt for years a contentment he’d missed. Wincing now as Hank moved out of him, finally putting his feet on the floor again, standing still as the damage repaired itself. Feeling the familiar itching and tenderness as nerves repaired themselves, Hank’s breathing was still laboured and he knew he watching him heal. Turning to look at Hank he saw tears running down his face, the look of pure hatred on his face, knowing he’d hurt him, caused him pain with his love. Something Hank hated doing, he was a doctor he was supposed to alleviate pain not cause it, shifting his jeans up around his waist but not fastening them Logan reached out to Hank. Hank backed away from him a little about to run when Logan grabbed his fur tight and pulled him into his embrace.
The smell of his own blood reached Logan, picking out the scent of his arousal within it, he’d wanted it, he’d needed it and Hank had given it freely. He couldn’t allow him to carry the thought that he’d done this alone to him, “Thank you Hank.” Hank just looked at him through the tears that were still falling, his voice thick with them when he answered.
“Why? I hurt you Logan, I raped you, you bled, I never wanted to hurt you.” Seeing the pain in him Logan brought Hank’s large head closer to his own whispering to him.
“I wanted you Hank, I needed you and you gave me it, that isn’t rape Hank it’s trust.” Hazel met amber and the look that passed between them both settled Hank’s tears.
"No-one else knows Hank, it’s something even Marie doesn’t know about me.” Hank saw the pain of it in his eyes that he’d kept this from her that he needed to feel dominated when he needed it.
Suddenly realising why Logan always took on impossible odds, it wasn’t because he had a better chance of surviving, it was because he needed it. He needed to be lost in the hugeness of the task, the difficulty of it, the overwhelming strength of the enemy, the desire to lose himself to it, to fall into its embrace and be destroyed utterly. Falling apart as he had done under Hank’s own large body, seeing it understood in Hank, Logan touched the wet fur on Hank’s face and added his own tears to the mixture of scents. “Understand Hank? Tell me you understand what I’m telling you here!” Logan’s voice sounding desperate for him to understand and not reject him for it. For not wanting to be the defender all the time, for wanting to lose once in while, to be weak with someone who understood the reason why he had to.
Wrapping his huge arms around Logan, Hank held him tight to him as Logan cried into his fur, purring as he held him. Knowing he’d seen something that meant more than a card, more than a stolen kiss in a hallway, he’d let him see his weakness and shared it willingly with him. He’d let him into his heart and he knew Logan loved him even if he couldn’t say it or express it. His own voice rumbling and soft when he answered Logan, “I understand Logan, I do and I’ll be here when you need me. I’ll always be here.” When Logan heard ‘always,’ he gripped the deep fur tighter, letting everything pour from him into the deep blue black. Holding Logan steady as he cried Hank felt the bond between them deepen, he’d always be hers but a part of him would always be his. He gave him something she couldn’t, the ability to feel small and in being so be vulnerable, something he valued highly.
Finally, Logan pulled away from him, eyes red and skin flushed pink. Sniffing he wiped his eyes clear and rubbed himself against the firm muscle in front of him, voice still a little shaky Logan spoke to him. “Fancy doing a bit of work now Hank? Still got to get the stairs finished today and I could do with the help.” Logan looked up into the calm amber stare and found the warmth of a lover shining back at him, knowing that Hank understood everything he’d been trying to tell him without saying it. It was too hard for him to admit to himself never mind anyone else and he was trusting Hank with a lot. Smiling Hank bent to Logan’s lips and kissed him gently, running his tongue over Logan’s own, hearing the little intake of Logan’s breath as he did so making Hank smile.
“Of course, that’s what I’m here for, to help you any way I can. Professors orders don’t you know.” A leer had plastered itself across Logan’s features and Hank knew they’d be enjoying each other again later if Logan had anything to do with it.
“Really? Prof’s orders eh?” Squeezing himself tight against Hank’s fur knowing he could feel his body tighten and lengthen against his stomach, rubbing himself against the sensitive fur. “We’d better follow orders then.” His eyes finding Hank’s and seeing the message understood loud and clear, pushing himself out of Hank’s grasp he went toward the forest edge turning round to see Hank looking confused. “You coming?” The leer almost devilish as Hank began to move toward Logan, “If you want it you’ll have to catch it.” Logan’s hand on his groin already stroking it to full size before running off into the underbrush. Hank smiling he let out a long low rumble that scared birds and animals for half a mile around, hearing the light laughter from Logan as he caught the sound. Oh he’d catch him and when he did, he’d give him something else to smile about.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Jean returns, Marie solidifies her position with Logan, Xavier gets involved in the triangle and makes sure Logan knows he knows about the 'arrangement'.
Wolverine admits to needing something more than Marie, someone who can make him feel 'small'.
Wolverine admits to needing something more than Marie, someone who can make him feel 'small'.