Even before the events in the supermarket, he should have known trouble was coming. It was just one of those weeks. And it looked like it was going to turn into one of those months.
It all started so innocently. He'd been sitting in the common room, smoking a cigar and drinking a beer, just to piss Scooter off. Then, in walked his sweet, innocent, and fresh smelling Marie. If he had known about her malicious plot at the time, he would have told her to walk herself right on outta there.
But he didn't.
As it was, he was so glad to see her separated from that damn ice cube, she had to repeat her request twice before he finally heard it.
"Huh? Wha?"
"Logan..." she whined in that cute accent of hers. "Haven't you been listening to me?"
"Uhh..." Was there a safe way to answer that?
"I asked you if you could take me to the store. Ah need to pick up a couple of things. Is that alright?"
"Yeah. Yeah, sure, kid. Just lemme get my keys."
And so him and Marie had gone out and gotten into his truck. She chattered happily at him about some plans her and her roommates had for that weekend, and he half-listened as usual.
He slipped an arm around her thin shoulders as they entered the supermarket, just another two people out on a Saturday afternoon.
"Logan, would you push the cart, sugah? I kinda got mah hands full." She pointed to a list she had produced from her pocket and his eyes got wide. The thing had to be at least three pages long.
"Yeah. No problem. Just try not to take too long, okay kid?"
"No problem, sugah. Don't you worry about a thing." That smile should have tipped him off. It was just a little too sweet...
"Okay. First, a disposable camera... Next, a box of shortbread cookies..."
The list went on and on. And of course, no two things could be on the same aisle. She finally seemed to be winding down when he heard...
"Okay, got the Midol for Kitty... Now, Playtex Silk Glide Super Absorbency Tampons... Always Super Protection Maxis with Wings... Slender Regular Absorbency Tampax Tampons..."
Before Logan's horrified eyes the pile of feminine hygiene products in the cart slowly grew to enormous proportions. He couldn't turn a corner without something falling off the top. Then he'd have to stop and pick it up. Before long he could feel the heat coloring his face.
"Marie," he growled. The tone he used had caused grown men to run in terror. The teenaged girl in front of him didn't even turn around.
"Almost done, sugah. Last thing..." She squinted at the list in front of her. "Durex Ultimate Feeling Spermicidal Condoms, twelve pack."
Logan felt himself begin choking. "What the hell do you need those things for?!"
Three people in the aisle turned to stare at the couple, then quickly walked away.
"Well..." She began twining a lock of white hair around one gloved finger. "Ah do have a boyfriend now, and a girl can never be too careful. At least, that's what my momma always used to tell me."
"Okay. Alright. Let's just get out of here."
"Sure thing, sugah. Ah'm all done now."
Slowly they made their way to the checkout line. Logan could swear that every set of eyes in the store was on him as he unloaded that cursed cart for her. But at least it was almost over.
Beep. Beep. Beep.
The cashier looked down at her register, made a face, then picked up a phone. Seconds later, Logan realized it was the store loudspeaker.
"Price check on register three for Playtex Silk Glide Super Absorbency Tampons. I repeat price check on register three for Playtex Silk Glide Super Absorbency Tampons."
And so he had to wait until someone else called the price back over the intercom. Then came the true slam.
"Oh no, Logan... I forgot mah purse at the school! Ah don't have mah wallet! Could you please, please, please cover this for me? I promise ah'll pay ya back later."
Gritting his teeth, Logan pulled out his wallet and counted the money into the grinning woman's hand.
Finally they were carrying bags out to his truck. He was almost free.
"Marie?"
"Yeah, Logan?"
He piled the bags in the back of his truck. "What was that about?"
Marie flashed him a sexy grin he never could have imagined on her face before that moment.. "Just proving ah'm no child..."
Fin
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