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Author's Chapter Notes:
some basic knowledge of Heroes might come in handy for this chapter; but I tried to explain enough so that you can still understand it if you don't know the show.

credit for a certain quote about Wolverine and dancing goes to Hugh Jackman @ the Tonys...you'll know what I mean ^.^

btw, I think this story is developing a life of its own...this certainly wasn't in my head when I sat down and started writing this morning...I suspect it was partly inspired by a pic I saw on deviantart a couple of weeks ago and was very thrilled about, being a big fan of both X-Men and Heroes: http://quirkyslayer.deviantart.com/art/Ninth-Blunders-1-46279160
Why? How? What to do? How to deal?

That's pretty much the extent of the thoughts that are running through my head while I'm in my room, hiding away from the rest of the world like some of the kids do when they're in some teenage identity crisis. Can't believe it has come to this.

I'm surprised I even made it here without any accidents on the way back home. I was so confused that I even stuck to the speed limit – I know; what the hell, right? I mean that's something Scott does, not me. Jeez.

But really, what am I supposed to do?

I thought being attracted to Rogue was bad, but realizing I'm in love with her? Please! I don't fall in love, ever.
It's way too complicated.

I meet a girl, we have sex, we never see each other again; that's usually how it goes. It's not that I don't respect women or anything; but love or long-term relationships...all that crap just ain't my cup of tea.

Now there aren't only the constant fantasies and dirty thoughts in my head, but also some fluffy stuff that feels like cotton candy...and not in a good way.
That shit is sticky. Not fun to have in your brain.

And all because of this adorable little girl that's way too young for me. I thought having the hots for Jeannie was the peak of “never gonna happen” and sexual frustration, but Rogue easily tops that; not only because of the fluffy candy.

Damn...there's a bunch of mental images coming up...my girl eating cotton candy, tugging at it and then licking it off her fingers, one by one...oh shit. This ain't good. I have to find some kind of distraction...

Go out and fight somebody? Maybe a cage fight? That usually makes me feel better...but then again, I'm not really up for it.
Wouldn't be able to concentrate. It's sad to admit but I'd probably get my ass kicked because I'm too busy thinking about her.

So I guess the next best thing is to go downstairs, grab a beer and hope the rec room isn't full of kids. I think there's a rerun of Die Hard on TV later, that should make me feel better.




It's almost midnight already, so most of the students are on their way to bed. I pass by a group of boys heading back to their rooms and it looks like I'm really lucky, the room is deserted -

- except for Rogue and her two roommates. The universe really isn't on my side today.

“Hey Logan,” Rogue chirps cheerfully.

She's kneeling down in front of the DVD-player, a box of discs in her hand.

I give the girls a nod and then back right out of the door again. Whatever chick flick they're gonna be watching, it won't really brighten my mood.

“Wait, where are you going?”

“Uh...to bed?” I reply lamely.

“No, no, no,” Rogue says, motioning for me to come back. “Sit. You can watch Heroes with us. Right girls?”

Her two friends seem a little intimidated by my presence but nod their heads eagerly, giggling.

Being the lovestruck idiot I am, of course I do what she says and take a seat on the couch while I watch her pop in a DVD. She throws the remote to Kitty and then comes to sit on the floor, between my feet; her head lightly resting against my knee and I'm beginning to questions my sanity. She's right there, sitting between my legs, for fuck's sake!

Trying to focus my thoughts anywhere else but on my little girl between my knees, I turn my head to her friends. Jubilee is holding the box of DVDs, studying the text on the back.

“What are we watching?” I ask, sincerely trying to be interested in what will be happening on the TV screen in a few seconds.

But asking that question was possibly the biggest mistake of the entire evening, because Rogue turns around to look at me and explain what the show is about.
All I can focus on are her lips. She's wearing red lip gloss that smells like cherries and every time she says a word with an 'o', she gives me a good image of what they would look like wrapped around -

“...isn't that cool?”

I gulp. Didn't catch a word of what she just said, so I just grunt noncommittally. She seems to be content with that.

“Gimme that, please.” She puts one hand on my thigh to prop herself up high enough to be able to reach the DVD box that Jubilee is holding out for her to take.

I hold back a frustrated groan and dig my fingers into the cushions on the couch.

“Tonight we will teach you how to be a fangirl.”

I raise one eyebrow and give Rogue a quick grin when I see the smile it brings to her face.
Right. That eyebrow fetish of hers. Well it's only fair to tease her a little when she's doing...that.

“You can believe your ears, you'll be a fangirl. The term isn't really limited to the female gender; it's more of a state of mind, really.”

I have no idea what she's even talking about but nod and stretch my legs a little, because fuck I need to get my crotch out of her face if I don't wanna die of unsatisfied desires tonight.

“The show we're watching – or better, the show we're currently fangirling about; it's a verb as well – is called Heroes.”

She takes a small booklet out of the box and points at pictures of various people in it while she's explaining me some more about the storyline.

“Basically, the people on the show are just like us, because they have powers and all. But most of them don't know that there are others like them out there, so it's very confusing for them. See, this guy here can walk through walls, like Kitty.”
She shows me the picture of a black guy who is strangling some hot blond chick.

“This guy here, Peter, can absorb other people's powers when he's near them, so we figured he's kinda like me. And he's very cute, so I'm mostly his fangirl.”

He's just a fictional character, I keep telling myself as I feel jealousy tying my stomach into a tight knot. She just called herself someone else's girl! Fangirl. Whatever. She's mine.

“And this, Claire Benett...” she begins and points at a petite blond girl with a cheerleader uniform and , I have to admit, a kind of pretty smile.
“...is you,” Kitty finishes and breaks into a fit of giggles along with Jubilee.

I shoot them a dark look. Nobody associates me with a cheerleader in any way and lives to see the next day.
Wolverine doesn't do high kicks. Got that? Good.

I throw in a little growl just for good measure and to make sure they don't tell anyone about my cheerleader mutie twin.

And 'cause I suspect growling kind of turns Rogue on as well.

“It's just coz she heals herself...you know?” Jubilee says to her defense, creeping away from me and grabbing Kitty's hand for moral support.
It's actually pretty funny how scared these girls are of me.

“You can be her fangirl,” Rogue suggests, capturing my attention again. “She's cute, don't you think?”

I'm about to tell her that the little blondie is a bit young for me (looks about 15 or something) and that I'd rather “fangirl” over/for/about(?) the other chick I saw, but bite my tongue in the last moment.
Who am I to talk about girls being too young for me to lust after, huh?

“Okay,” I reply, “so what do I have to do?”

The terrible two break into laughter again, immediately stopping it when I even as much as look at them from the corner of my eye.

“Well, basically...you just get really really involved with everything she does...you like her a whole lot, so you worry about her when something bad is about to happen to her, and cry when she's sad, and squeal a whole lot whenever she's on screen...especially when she's wearing something cute...that about it, guys?” she asks, raising her head to check back with her friends.
They nod, by now all cuddled up under a big blanket in the corner of the couch, as far away from me as possible. Be afraid, kids. Be very afraid.





Nobody would believe the things one could learn while watching DVDs with three little girls.

Jubilee taught me that a profound knowledge of genetics can be quite a turn-on, if presented correctly and with an Indian accent.

From Kitty, I learned that continued squealing and screaming eventually leads to a lack of oxygen so severe it can make you dizzy. And hurt the ears of everybody around you. I'm not sure if I'll ever recover from that.

But my teacher Rogue taught me the most important thing of the day: Projection.

The lesson was implicit, but I got it. Or maybe I just heard what I wanted to hear.
Either way, we had an interesting conversation while we were watching her object of fangirling and mine interact.

“Too bad they're like cousins or something...I think they would be cute as a couple,” Rogue commented; still sitting between my legs, by the way, having way too much fun pretending she didn't know she was torturing me.

I didn't reply immediately, looking at her expectantly while her roommates started babbling about how it probably wasn't true at all and that they weren't in fact related, because they're pretty much the poster couple of the show and have to get together at some point.

“Peter is the first other person with powers that Claire meets,” Rogue explained to me. “So it's really exciting for her, knowing she isn't alone. And he saves her life and then borrows her power to heal himself, so they're pretty close right away.”

“But isn't he like 15 years older than her?” Kitty throws in, unknowingly asking the question that's been on my tongue all along.

“Oh well, if it's love, it's love. They are together in real life, you know. Milo and Hayden.”

Of course my little girl delivered the whole thing with such amazing innocence that I would be crazy to think anything of it.
And still, I couldn't keep my mind off that little talk all night.




“So, kid, how'd I do?” I ask her when the girls finally start getting tired and get ready to go upstairs to their room.

“Hmm...” She puts a finger to her lips and furrows her brows, as if in deep thought.

“I think you need to work on the squealing. Didn't even hear you try just once.” Very perceptive, kid. She didn't really expect me to squeal did she?

“But the whole empathy thing and getting worried about her...you were quite good with that.” Easy. All I had to do was imagine it was her.
She smiles sweetly, enjoying my dedication to our little game.

“It's your turn tomorrow. I think I taught you enough to survive in here for a couple more days.”

“All right. You think of something you wanna learn, okay?”

“And lemme guess, can't be the motorcycle?” she asks, slightly disappointed.

“Yep, you got it. G'night, kid.”

“Night, Logan.”
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