All the years I've tried
With more to go
Will the memories die?
* * * *
Damn it, he had to stop doing this to himself. He hadn't been back to the mansion since Alcatraz, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't seem to forget her. He couldn't count the years that had passed, but no matter how long it had been, she still hovered at the edge of his mind.
Today was one of those really bad days. He'd pulled into a bar for food, and the smell hit him square in the chest. Marie. The growl rose up in his chest. Too many times he'd thought another woman was her. A glimpse of long brown hair, the soft purr of a southern drawl...
Logan kicked the stand on his bike and shoved his way through the heavy wooden door. He seated himself in a booth in the corner and glared at the waitress wiping the table.
“Oh- uh. Hello.” The girl's smile was too cheery, “something to drink?”
Logan grunted. “I'll have a beer”
The girl nodded, pushing a stray hair behind her ear before fleeing the scene.
Logan chuckled and shook his head. That definitely wasn't Marie. He sniffed, scanning the room's scents. Smoke hung in the air, clouding his senses. Beyond the smoke and sweat he could smell grease, and coffee... he sniffed again, drawing a good long breath.
The girl came back with his beer, raising an eyebrow at him as she set the bottle on the table.
“That's... uh, probably the stew you smell,” she smiled, “it's real good – I made it myself.”
Logan took a swig of beer, ignoring her.
“Would you like a bowl?”
Logan nodded. Anything to get her away. Her cheap perfume was burning his nose.
* * * *
Trudging down the side of the road she looked up and shielded her eyes from the setting sun. A harsh wind kicked up the leaves and made them dance around her. Marie curled up into her flimsy jacket, cursing to herself. Damn! She hated the cold. In the distance she saw the neon sign for Joe's flicker to life. Marie picked up the pace, heading for the lone building along the stretch of road. She didn't want to be late for work again. Joe didn't seem to care, but he wasn't the kind of person that she wanted to mess with.
Joe's was probably just the sort of bar you'd expect to find on the side of the highway in the middle of nowhere. It looked like a log cabin – if in fact it had been one before being a bar, she didn't know. Large picture windows glowed with neon signs for different brands of beer, half of them not working, and the wooden step at the entrance was sagging in one corner. In short – it was a dump. But it was the only bar in town, so it always had customers. The food wasn't half-bad, though.
Stepping inside, Marie had to adjust her vision to the dim lighting. The air was already hazy with smoke – compliments of a group of men gathered around the dart board.
“Marie!” a woman exclaimed, walking towards her. Marie turned to her and smiled. The woman wiped her forehead with the back of her arm and grinned back. “Thank goodness you're here, now I can go home and collapse.”
“Oh gimme a break, Colleen, the lunch shift is nothing compared to night, and you know it,” she was kidding, of course. This exchange was common between the two of them.
Marie made her way past the counter to the staff room in the back, Colleen right on her tail.
“You should see this guy out in the dining room,” Colleen squealed, following Marie into the cramped room.
“Shouldn't you be out there working?” Marie looked over her shoulder at the girl.
Colleen pouted, but she didn't leave. “Fine, I'll just keep him all to myself.”
“Oh?” Marie hung up her coat, and pulled out her apron from the closet.
“Colleen, are you in here?” a deep voice from the other side of the door asked. The door opened and Joe stuck his bald head in “Get your ass back out there, missy. The customers don't serve themselves ya know.”
“Ah, I'll tell you later,” Colleen grinned before darting out the door.
Marie shook her head, tied on her apron and left the room. The dart players were now gathered around the bar, talking amongst themselves. Marie slid in behind the counter and smiled at them.
“Can I get you boys anything?” Most of them ignored her, one of the younger men asked for a beer. Big surprise.
Marie was wiping glasses when Colleen slid up to the bar.
“Refill my Sprite please,” Colleen leaned against the counter. Looking around, she leaned in and hissed, “He's gone!”
“Who?” Marie asked, confused.
“That guy! When I came back from the change room he wasn't there.”
Marie filled the glass and handed it back to her.
“At least he left a good tip,” Colleen grinned, “God knows I deserve it.”
Marie couldn't help but laugh.
Outside, Logan leaned against the wall, eyes closed and his head tilted to the sky. His heart was hammering in his chest.
Fuck. That was close.
He hadn't noticed her walk in, but when the waitress had called out Marie's name, he nearly choked on his beer. When Marie had disappeared to the back, he'd thrown a few bills on the table and bolted.
But he couldn't make himself get back on his bike.
* * * *
Marie dropped her envelope of receipts onto the desk and closed the office door. Joe had left early tonight, claiming that he wanted time with his family. Marie doubted it, but she didn't prod into Joe's private life and he didn't prod into hers. But him leaving early meant she had to close the bar – and walk home alone. Ugh.
In the change room she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror and sighed. The circles under her eyes were permanent, it seemed. Her hair was cropped short around her chin, a style that took no effort to care for. Marie sighed as she threw on her coat and trudged through the empty building. Another day come and gone. This was her life now – it had been for a long time. A long string of days that passed without her noticing. She wondered if one day she would wake up and find herself an old woman without knowing where the time had gone.
Marie flicked off the lights, turned on the security system and locked the door behind herself. The hair on the back of her neck prickled, and she looked over her shoulder expecting to see someone. It was dark out, and nothing caught her eye. She pulled her jacket closer around herself and trotted quickly across the parking lot.
The air was frigid, but still. She could hear animals scampering in the trees along the side of the road. It didn't help ease the feeling that she was being watched. A shudder rippled through her body when she realized she was alone, her house was the only one around for a good distance. If something happened to her...
Marie quickened her pace, humming to herself to break the silence. Just around this bend and she'd be home. Just a little further.
A twig snapped behind her and she broke into a run. A small voice in her mind told her it was probably just a squirrel, but the rest of her was too busy conjuring wild images of bears or wolves or God knows what else lurked in the dark.
Her house came into view, but Marie didn't slow until she reached the door. Her hands shook as she stuck her key into the lock, but she managed. The door flung open and she shut it quickly, pressing her back against it.
“...Mom?” A sleepy voice called out. Marie gasped a few times before answering,
“Yeah, it's me honey.” Marie kicked off her shoes and hung her coat up before walking through the living room and peeking into the open door.
“How are you doing?”
“I'm fine.”
Marie made her way through the room, stepping over comic books and discarded clothing. A small face was peeking out from under the blankets, blond curls hanging in his eyes. Marie smoothed his hair and he pulled away.
“Mom, I'm fine,” he sighed.
“I still worry about you. Are you sure you don't want Sam to keep you company while I'm at work?”
“She still comes every day,” he pouted.
“But she doesn't stay the whole time,” Marie reminded him.
“I'm a big kid. I can put myself to bed. I brushed my teeth and everything.”
“Don't be smart with me,” Marie chided, grinning. She bent down to kiss him, even though he wiped it away afterwards.
“Go to sleep, I'll see you in the morning,”
“Yeah, yeah.”
Marie made it through the room and shut the door behind her. She walked the few steps to the couch and collapsed onto it, sleep came quickly but it wasn't restful.
For Marie, it usually wasn't.
* * * *
Marie was buttering toast when her son came into the kitchen. His hair was sticking out all over, and his eyes weren't quite open all the way.
“Hey sleepyhead,” Marie placed his plate on the table. The boy sat and began picking at his eggs. Marie placed a kiss on his forehead, and went to change her clothes in the bathroom. She didn't have the luxury of her own bedroom. When her son had been old enough to need his own room, she had sacrificed her single bed to him and retreated to the couch.
“Ready to go?” She called down the hall.
“Yeah.”
“Get your coat on, it's cold out today.”
They walked down the short driveway, stopping at the mailbox. Marie turned to look at her son and sighed, “You can't go to school looking like that.”
“Why?” He rolled his eyes.
Marie tried in vain to smooth his wild hair, after a minute she gave up. She licked her thumb and reached for his face.
“Eww, please don't! Go back inside!”
“What? Why?” Marie put her hands on her hips.
“I don't want my friends to make fun of me.”
“For me wiping your face or for me waiting at the stop with you?”
“Both,” he sulked.
“Well, I'm not going anywhere.”
They stayed silent for a moment before the loud rumble of the bus was heard.
“Okay, you can go now.”
Marie smiled, kissed him on the cheek and smoothed his hair again. “Love you”
“Yeah, me too,” he grumbled.
The bus pulled up and the boy hopped inside. Marie watched it drive off into the mist and shivered.
Back in the house, Marie kicked off her shoes and went back to the kitchen. She put the kettle on the only element that worked on her stove and turned it on. She was reaching for a mug when she heard a rustle behind her. She glanced over her shoulder and jumped back.
“Jesus!” she shrieked. The mug crashed to the floor, shattering into hundreds of little pieces.
Logan leaned against the wall and smirked. “Nice to see you too, darlin'.”
Marie gaped at him.
“Nice place you got here,” he said as he looked around.
“Wh-what are you doing here?” Marie shook her head and blinked a few times, “how did you find me?”
Logan shrugged and pulled a chair at the table for himself. Marie was at a loss for words. She stood in the same spot, staring at him for a long time before he said anything else.
“So, why'd you leave the mansion? I thought you were happy there.” He asked.
Marie looked away and clenched her jaw. The kettle started whistling, so she reached over to turn it off. She paced back to grab another mug when she stepped on a piece of broken ceramic. She cursed under her breath.
Logan stood up and came to her. “Here,” he said, “let me help you.” He grabbed her ankle and pulled off her sock. After examining her bare foot for a moment, it hit him.
“Your skin?”
“The cure,” Marie said, not meeting his gaze.
“I thought it didn't work?”
“It suppressed it enough. Unless I concentrate, my skin is harmless.”
Logan nodded.
“Can I have my foot back now?” Marie asked. Logan relented.
Marie stepped cautiously across the kitchen and grabbed the broom. She swept up the mess and sighed.
“You know, I'd appreciate it if you took off your boots in my house.”
“I'd appreciate it if I got some answers.”
“So would I!” Marie stopped sweeping and put her hand on her hip. “What makes you think you can just barge into my home like this? What are you doing here, anyways?”
“Was it because of the kid?”
Marie paused. “... Huh?”
“Storm would have helped you, you know. She would have looked after you.”
“I...that... it's really none of your business,” Marie scowled. She turned and busied herself by making her tea. “Is that why you're here? Are you trying to bring me back?” Marie's heart was pounding, her hands shook as she stirred the tea bag around in the pot.
“I'm just making sure that you're okay.”
“Nice to know you care. You're about eight years too late.”
“Hey, don't blame me for Ice Boy's mistakes,” Logan growled. Marie turned and looked at him, confused.
“What?”
“The kid. He's yours, isn't he?” Logan motioned to the drawings stuck on the fridge.
“Yeah...”
Logan looked back at her and raised an eyebrow. “Well, isn't Drake the father?”
Marie swallowed and nodded slowly. “Ye- yeah,” she looked away, “Yeah, he is.”
They both were silent as Marie poured two mugs of tea and brought them to the table. Logan held the mug in his hands for a moment before taking a sip. Marie avoided his gaze as she stirred in sugar.
“I was tracking Sabretooth.”
Marie paused and looked up. “Here?”
Logan nodded.
“Why is he here?”
“Not sure. I've been following him for a few weeks. I don't know what he's after.” Logan sipped the tea again. “You got any food? I'm starvin'.”
* * * *
Fall to Pieces by Velvet Revolver
The Wolverine & Rogue Fanfiction Archive
Barely Legal Since 2000