Scott sat back against the headboard and closed his eyes. Rogue snuggled up beside him, with her head against his chest. His arms were wrapped around her holding her close. As he held Rogue in his arms, the pain in his head lessened. This allowed him to think about what was going on. Here he was, with Rogue, finally in his arms. In his deepest darkest fantasies he'd always been drawn to her. It had always made him feel guilty for dreaming of her while he was committed to Jean. He always wondered what that made of him. Sometimes it made him feel very hypocritical when he argued with Jean about her flirtatious manner towards other men, but while she was open in her enjoyment of others attentions, he always did everything he could to hide his.
He remembered all the times he'd dreamed of walking through the gardens at night with Rogue by his side. The times he wished they could snuggle up on a couch in the dark and watch some movies, maybe sharing a bowl of popcorn or a blanket to keep warm on a cold winter night. Most of his fantasies were non-sexual, more of a comfort and a love shared. He'd felt a deep connection to Rogue. After all, who else would understand living with a mutation like hers? She couldn't touch others without fear of hurting them. So she covered herself in layers from neck to toe to keep herself and others safe from her uncontrollable mutation. Likewise, he could not open his eyes without incinerating whatever he looked at with an uncontrollable laser blast from his naked eyes, so he too was covered to keep others safe. Always he wore ruby colored lenses, either his visor, special sunglasses or goggles. Everything he saw was a shade of red. The other colors of the world were but a fleeting dream left from his childhood. He longed for the freedom to live without the curse of his eyes, just as he knew Rogue desired a freedom from her skin.
Last night however his dreams of Rogue changed. He'd had the most amazing, the most erotic dream of the two of them making love. Skin to skin they'd been. The dream had been so vivid. She'd been so hot, so wet, so tight around him. He'd been her first, her only lover. He could still remember every sigh, every moan, every caress. He'd licked every part of her body, starting from her lips then to her ears, down her neck, then paying special attention to her perfect breasts. He remembered how she tasted as he moved down between her legs, holding them apart and driving her insane with need with his licks and nibbles. Oh God, he thought to himself, I can still taste her on my tongue. Looking down, he realized he was getting hard. He didn't want to embarrass Rogue with his obvious arousal, so he concentrated instead on what he just watched on her laptop. Thoughts of Jean and her protege immediately got rid of the evidence of his arousal for Rogue.
“That was really Jean on the screen wasn't it? It wasn't some shape-shifter or some look-alike or movie-magic or anything?” Scott ran his hand over Rogue's head caressing her long, soft hair.
“It was her.” Rogue snuggled in closer tightening her arms around Scott. “Do you want to talk about what you just saw?”
“No. I think I just want to digest it, like Jubilee said.” He leaned down and rubbed his cheek against her hair.
“Do you want me to leave you alone while you digest?” she whispered.
“No. But maybe we can lay down, this headboard isn't doing anything for my back.” He moved down on the bed bringing her with him. They settled together, wrapped around each other.
“Good. Then I'm not moving from here.” She snuggled closer, moving one of her legs between his.
“Perfect.” He closed his eyes, and recalled all the he had just seen, trying to make sense of it.
_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
Logan and Jubilee got into the truck and just sat there a moment. “What was that you gave to them?”
Jubilee chuckled softly. “Just a couple of joints.”
“Really?” Logan raised an eyebrow to Jubilee.
“What?” she said defensively. “You of all people can't complain about a little soother.”
“I'm not saying anything. I'm just trying to picture our Fearless Leader stoned.” Logan shook his head. “I'd almost pay money to see that.”
“You might just get your wish. Even if he doesn't smoke it, I know Roguey will and with the little ventilation in there I'm sure he'll get some of the effect even if he doesn't want any.” Jubilee sat back against her seat, closing her eyes and laying her head back. She took a few deep breaths.
“Just tell me one thing. I need to know before we go back and watch the rest of that video.” Logan clenched his hands on the steering wheel. “Was she raped? Did Jean and that motherfucker rape her?” He looked over at Jubilee.
She looked over at Logan with wide eyes and then down at her lap. “I'm not sure how to answer that question. Was she raped? I don't know. We didn't really discuss that. I don't know what was done with her consent and what wasn't. But that asshole didn't touch her. He's too afraid of her skin.”
“You said Scott was just as much a victim as Rogue. Is he on that video also? Did Jean force Scott to...” he trailed off. “Is it safe to leave them alone here?”
“He's on it. Is it safe to leave them alone together? I think so. I just don't know how you will react.” Jubilee looked over at Logan. “Can I ask you a question?”
“Yeah.” Logan turned in his seat back to his door to fully face Jubilee.
“How do you really feel about Rogue? I mean will you freak out if she has romantic ideas about another man? Do you love her?” she asked hesitantly.
Logan smiled. “Yes, I love her. I always will. I am not afraid to say it, admit it or tell anyone. Hell everyone should already know it how we are together. We love each other. Hell, it was damn near love at first sight. From the first time noticed her sneaking peaks at me across the bar, I felt something. Took me a little bit to understand what it was, but once I knew, I knew. Am I in love with her? That's something else entirely. I don't know the answer to that one. She's very special to me. I'm always going to protect her, take care of her if I can.” Logan fumbled around for a cigar, cracking his truck window to let the smoke out after he lit it and exhaled a cloud of smoke. “I'm not her father, I'm not her brother, but I don't feel like I'm her husband or boyfriend either.”
“Do you think you could fall in love with her?” Jubilee asked.
“Hell yah. Easily. But not now. She's too young for me now. I don't mean in years, I mean, she has a lot of life to live, to experience. The woman I form that kind of relationship with, will be an equal. Someone who knows what they want and has the experience to back up the confidence that will be needed to live a life with me. Someday she might be that woman. But not right now.” Logan continued smoking.
“What if she falls in love with someone else while you are waiting for her to experience life?” she wondered out loud.
“That's part of the experience she needs. To fall in love, to live her life, to learn what a relationship is.” Logan explained.
“But what if she falls in love, gets married, has babies, then grows into an old grandma?” Jubilee cocked her head to the side, trying to picture Rogue with white hair on a rocking chair knitting a sweater.
“As long as she lives a long happy life, then I'll be happy for her. That's all I want for her. To keep her safe, healthy and happy. I'm a simple man. Kind of. Right now, that is the only goal I have.” Logan continued to smoke.
“What about finding your past? I thought that was your goal. Isn't that why you keep taking off all the time?” she raised an eyebrow back at him in a decidedly Wolverine style.
Logan coughed and scratched at his neck. “There are some things I can't talk to you about without discussing it with Rogue first. There are some things in our relationship that we haven't told anyone yet, and I think we may have to discuss them along with whatever the hell is on that video.”
“I think you're right. And I think we need to get the hell out of this nasty motel before we discuss all this stuff. And I think we need to find some kind of brain/mind healer type person who can help Rogue and Scott. Who knows what Jean's done to them. Yesterday I would have thought the Professor to be the one to go to, but now, I just don't know for sure. Do you know anyone around here that could help us?”
Scratching his head in thought, Logan replied, “Not here in New York, but I do know someone up North. I think you're right too. I think we need to go in that room, pack up those two and head up to Canada. I think the sooner we get on the road the better. The more distance between us and any telepaths, the better.”
“I agree. Question is, will they agree?” she looked at the door contemplatively.
“Only one way to find out.” Logan opened his truck door and headed back to the motel room.