Rogue waited patiently as Hank set up the heartbeat monitor. She felt particularly vulnerable reclined on the bed in the med lab, her shirt hiked up and her waistband pushed down so that the swell of her stomach was exposed, but she was confident what the results of the test would be. She could hear the soft, quick sound of a third heartbeat in the room with them. Even though she would have given almost anything not to have Logan in her head again, a nice fresh version to torment her, she was so relieved by that sound that she was able to push the resentment to one side for the moment and just revel in her knowledge that the crazy doctor had not won. Her baby lived. She just knew it.
The door to the medlab slid open, and Scott hovered apprehensively in the doorway as if unsure if he should join her. Rogue summoned the strength to smile at him reassuringly. It was surprisingly hard, as if he hadn’t just risked his life, the teams, all to save her. She still wasn’t sure if she forgave him for bringing Logan along for the fun, but then a small part of her admitted that Scott probably wouldn’t have been strong enough to keep Logan away.
Scott strode over to her side when she smiled, and then Hank joined them. Hank smeared a cool gel on her stomach wordlessly. The monitor looked so small in his large blue hands as he gripped the wand and began to run it along her gel-covered skin. The rubbery plastic tip dug into her flesh slightly as he moved it, a distraction from the static pouring out of the microphone and the renewed growling in her head.
The sound of a quick swishing, its rhythm matching the beats Rogue could hear with her sensitive ears, filled the room. Hank smiled at her, and Rogue managed a more genuine smile for him than she had Scott. Speaking of her friend, he didn’t look nearly as surprised or relieved as she expected. Rogue wasn’t able to question him just then because Hank spoke up.
“The baby’s heartbeat sounds strong, Rogue. I think there is nothing to worry about for now, although I would appreciate it if you would come back for a check in the morning as well. First, I think you deserve to get some rest,” he said as he used a soft cloth to wipe away the blue gel on her stomach.
Rogue nodded. “Ah’ll do that, Hank. Thank you,” she said. Once he had wiped away all the goop, she rearranged her clothes and slid off of the bed. She hugged the big blue doctor impulsively, and he returned the embrace gently with a pat on her back.
Rogue strode out, ignoring Scott and Hank’s handshake and the way Scott almost ran to catch up with her. She stared straight ahead, not daring to say any of the things she wanted to just then.
“I’m glad the baby’s okay,” Scott said cautiously behind her.
Rogue stopped and whirled around, glaring at him. “Did you ask him to do it?” She knew he hadn’t. Of course she knew that. But he sounded so…so Scott that she just had to pick a fight.
Scott raised his hands up defensively. “Of course not! He suggested it before I could say anything, anyway,” he muttered.
Rogue closed her eyes and breathed deeply, trying to remind herself that she was safe, the baby was safe, and that was all that should matter. He was in her head, though, a gloating presence that made her want to reach out and punch something, preferably something warm and squishy. Since the only nearby candidate was Scott, her friend and the father of her child who probably couldn’t help how happy he was with the outcome of the whole fiasco, she couldn’t do that. So she just breathed.
“Rogue?” Scott sounded worried. Good, she thought.
“Why do you have to be so damn happy about this? Any of this? Ah don’t want any more of him in me, in any way, and yet you were all so eager to let him touch me thinking Ah wouldn’t have any control over my mutation!” she accused him irrationally, her eyes popping open.
Scott glowered at her behind his glasses. “So you wanted the baby to die, is that it? What about you? Did you want to die? Would that have been fucking worth it, Rogue? What cost should we have put on your life? Let me tell you, you are my best friend right now, and that baby is mine as much as it is yours. I don’t count any price high enough to keep you both alive and safe, not my life or any other X-Man’s, not my mind, and not even yours. We both know you can get past this, but you can’t get past being dead, and I don’t think you’d get past losing that baby!” he shouted, pointing at her barely rounded stomach.
Rogue felt the tears well in her eyes, and she tried to blink them away. She knew he was right. In her heart she knew it. Her head howled at the unfairness of being saddled with more of the man she wanted to avoid, pieces too recent, too fresh to ignore easily. How could she hate him, when he had given her the gift of her child’s life, almost as much as if he had fathered it himself. Logan was slowly easing his way back into her life, and it felt like there was nothing she could do to stop it.
Without another word to Scott, Rogue turned and ran down the hall. She almost fell into the elevator as the door whisked open, and she slammed her hand onto the button that would force the door closed behind her so that he couldn’t follow. Then she ripped into the control panel, pulling wires recklessly as the tube ground to a halt. Finally she was able to slump to the ground, tears streaming as she buried her face into her bare hands.
Logan grew worried when he didn’t hear Rogue come up the stairs to her room. He paced the small square of brown carpet in front of his bed, back and forth as he stared at the door. Something was wrong. He was sure of it. It couldn’t be the baby. That heartbeat had been too strong, just as strong as before Rogue was shot up with whatever was in that syringe.
Logan, the Professor’s voice echoed in his mind. We need your help with the elevator. It appears to have…malfunctioned.
Logan left his room, almost ran down the stairs, and stopped short when he saw Scott standing at the hall entrance to the elevator. The entry was a black hole in the dim light, and Scott just stood there with his fists clenched. Logan approached him carefully, picking up the scent of rage and fear emanating in waves from the other man.
Scott must have heard him anyway. “She stopped the fucking elevator,” he said wearily, the tone belying the anger Logan could still smell on him. The language shocked him a little. He wasn’t aware One-Eye knew words like that.
“What? Why?”
“I…might have yelled at her. Only a little!” Scott said defensively when Logan growled. He added quietly, “She was still angry that we let you touch her.”
Logan’s eyebrow shot up. “But the baby’s okay, right?”
Scott nodded. “Hank’s going to do what tests he can, with her skin, but yes. The baby seems to be fine. I just…I’m not sure she thinks it was worth it.”
Logan’s eyes clenched shut as the meaning hit him. She hated him so much that she would rather have let her baby die than be touched by him to save it? Despair washed over him. Had he really lost so much to her with one stupid act? Couldn’t she see that he was trying to make up for it the only way he knew how? He hung his head and ran a hand through his hair.
The sound of wheels on polished wood broke through the brooding of both men.
“Logan? Scott? Haven’t you got the elevator working yet?”
They snapped around at Xavier’s question and then looked at each other. Logan realized that they had both been focused so much on how they felt about the woman stuck in the elevator that they hadn’t even bothered trying to get her out. Scott blushed, and Logan felt a little satisfaction that he wasn’t so easily unmanned until he realized that his own face was growing hot.
“I’ll pull the damn thing up,” Logan ground out, reaching into the darkness to find the cable attached to the elevator tube.
Scott and the Professor were quiet as he worked, slowly inching up the elevator until the top cleared the bottom of the doorframe. Then Scott stepped forward to grip the lip of the door even as Logan let go of the cable to grab the same area. Together they pulled the thing all the way up. Logan forced open the door and looked in.
Rogue laid on the smooth metal floor, her hair pooled over her shoulders with her face buried in her arms. Her even breathing told him that she had fallen asleep, and the salty tang to the air revealed that she had cried herself to sleep. He stepped back wordlessly and gestured to Scott. He willed himself not to turn back, not to scoop her up into his arms. Remembering his resolve from earlier, he wondered if she would ever come to him of her own accord after all. Suddenly he wasn’t so sure that she would. Logan did the only thing he could. He walked away.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Ack! I know, it's been a while. Will you forgive me?
Chapter End Notes:
Well, maybe you won't forgive me after this. Sorry!