I tucked my keys into my pocket as I wandered into the mansion. It was filled with the quiet murmurs of most normal teenagers. And it always came as a surprise to me to see that she was no longer among them. No longer a kid. The first time I mentioned this to Jean she had said simply, without looking up from her magazine "It just means she doesn't need you to take care of her anymore."
It wasn't until now that I understood why that had bothered me.
Why it bothered me that she doesn't need me to take care of her.
I don't intend on making a scene. I just look around a while before reporting to the professor, who knows, maybe I'll run into someone. I'm not saying who. There's just a chance I'll run into... Oh forget it. I walked around the mansion a while, looking around, my eyes scanning over every face that passed by me. Who am I kidding?
I looked for her.
But she was no where. There was nothing more than a light trace of her scent every now and then. A sweet lingering smell of her along the walls. But finally, I had to give up and make my way to Wheels' office.
I had to force myself to think her name.
Marie.
I cringed instinctively before continuing on my way. Maybe I can move away again. Just disappear. No more wedding. Just me. Alone. The way I used to be. The way I was comfortable with. And now somehow I've gotten lost in a maze of repetition.
The cold metal of the doorknob helped to wake me up. Making the trip down to this fucking mansion had been waste of time after all. I just wanted to see her for a second. See if she was smiling. See if she was happy. That's what I wanted.
Amazing.
Amazing that I could be satisfied with that alone.
The knowledge that she's happy.
As I walked in, I didn't look around, just kept my eyes on the dark blue carpet as I closed the door behind me and started to walk to his desk, only to realize that there were others there. It took me half a second to recognize all of them.
The swamp rat, Ororo and were there. And sitting, staring straight out the window, was Marie. Frail, and completely rigid. I had never seen her more pale, but she had clearly made an effort of hiding exactly how distraught she was. Maybe things weren't working out with the Cajun. I realized that hope leaked into that thought. Maybe he's realizing he's an asshole.
"Nice of you to join us Logan." The professor said distinctly in that strong assured tone of his. Surprisingly I heard the reluctance in his voice, the same as there was in Jean's. Had he been hoping I wouldn't come? "Take a seat."
"I'll stand."
He nodded slowly.
Marie still hadn't turned to look at me.
Charles continued to talk while I looked at her. Wearing a green T-shirt overtop of a black long sleeved shirt, both loosely slipping over her skin in any movement she made. And she was wearing her famous jeans that I'd always make fun of her for. They were faded, had paint stains from when I helped her paint her bedroom, and had assorted rips. She loved those jeans to death.
I bought her a new pair once. But she still wears those ones.
"Logan?"
"Huh?" He snapped me out of my daydream like shattered glass.
"Will you be going to the UN summit?"
"Why the hell would I go to that?" When he raised an eyebrow suggestively like I was an idiot, I shrugged emotionlessly. “Sounds boring, that’ all.”
Charles smiled easily. "Because Hank has chosen you among other mutants to join him as his guests there. Ororo, Remy and Rogue will go with you." He hesitated "Should you choose to go."
He acted like that was an option.
“When?”
“Friday.”
‘Ro looked at me first, then the rat, and then slowly, taking her time Marie raised her head to look in my direction. She had mastered looking right through me. Not really seeing me. But the rat looked more pissed than I had ever seen him. He’ll have to deal with it.
“I’m in.”
***
That fucking asshole.
I couldn’t believe he did this. He had only accepted to go on the trip because he was desperate to make my life as miserable as possible. I will never understand him. I will never understand why he is so persistent to make me hate him.
I just want him to stay the fuck away from me. I want to move on. I want to give myself a chance to be happy with Remy and that is something I can’t do with Logan looming over my shoulder.
I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror, trying my best not to actually look at myself or notice how awful I looked. There was no way of fixing what he had done. I was the walking wounded. Heartbroken. Surviving. I felt like the empty space on a wall where a picture used to be.
I belonged in the as is section of a furniture store.
Taking a moment to rinse my hands I rubbed my neck to wake myself up before forcing myself to return to the table where Emma Frost, her boyfriend and Remy were waiting. I had been dragged to a double date. It was like making an atheist go to a Christian concert.
As I sat down next to Remy at the table, I could feel Emma’s boyfriend looking at me in that amused way. The way like he things he knows me. And Remy had already noticed it. No doubt he’d make me talk about it when we got home.
The appetizers had already arrived by the time I got back to the table. And Emma was watching me with the same curious eyes that he was. When I sat down, Remy had automatically set his hand down on my leg, a reflex movement, leaning into me to murmur something about how beautiful I looked.
I smiled in thanks. Trying not to barf in my mouth.
Compliments are great really. But I get extremely sick of the whole mushy concept.
“So, I hear you are all going to the UN Summit.” Emma murmured casually. “Are you looking forward to that?”
I smiled. “Yes.” I admitted. “But I’m not a big fan of hotels.”
“Spending a night out there too? Classy.” Her smile was genuine. “Who all is going?”
Remy and I shifted uncomfortably under the question. It was the big elephant in the room with us. Something we hadn’t cared to talk about, more chose not to. That way it was easier to avoid the awkwardness and general annoyance of the subject.
I knew he was trying his best to act casual as he said the names out loud. Like he was reading a list. And there had been a list. Xavier had told us who was coming in advance.
“Ororo, Hank, Rogue and I.” He paused. “And Logan.”
Emma’s slender blond eyebrow raised with a smile.
The Wolverine & Rogue Fanfiction Archive
Barely Legal Since 2000
Author's Chapter Notes:
Another split in character POV. Hopefully you like it.
Chapter End Notes:
Don't forget to comment!