~oOo~
"No shit, chica?"
"No shit, Jubes."
"Well, slap my ass and call me Shirley."
"I'll call you Shirley, but I'm not touching your ass."
Jubilee laughed so loudly into the phone that Rogue almost had to move the handset away from her ear. Jubilation Lee was Rogue's best friend. They'd met when Rogue first arrived at the mansion and the two girls had bonded quickly. It wasn't difficult with Jubilee following Rogue around, begging the new arrival to go shopping and offering to buy her some 'kickin' ensembles'. Jubilee was someone Rogue could talk to about everything and anything.
Jubilee had been at Stanford medical school at the time of the 'incident'. Her friend had taken a six week leave of absence to be with her but when Rogue realized the situation could be permanent, she told Jubilee to go back and finish school. That was one of the only knock down drag out fights they'd ever had. In the end, Jubilee had relented, not pleased to leave Rogue to deal with the aftermath on her own.
They'd been on the phone for at least thirty minutes. Rogue had detailed the events of the last week; after getting seriously scolded by the petite Asian for not calling her sooner.
"I always knew that big Neanderthal had a thing for you."
"Jubilee, I was seventeen."
"Yeah, and he's, like, one hundred and fifty. Everyone probably looks seventeen to him. Maybe he wasn't in love with you, but he knew you were something special, girl. And you are. No matter what that bitchy redhead tells you."
The memory of Jean's anger was still fresh in Rogue's mind. She tried to play it off but Rogue knew she probably didn't sound too convincing.
"I try to ignore her, Jubes."
Jubilee's voice took on that feisty tone that it did when she got herself riled up. "Bullshit. You want people to like you, Roguey, and they do. She's just batshit nuts and you know it. You need to be careful, chica. I don't want you in her way when she decides to go nuclear."
"Got it, Jubes."
"I'm serious, Rogue."
"I know you are, okay? I'll be careful."
"Speaking of being careful, make sure tall, dark and hairy wears a condom on that little wolverine of his."
"Jubilation Lee!"
"Don't pretend you haven't thought about it."
"We just talked, Jubes! He only just got back here and I don't even know if I want to…oh hell…I don't know what I want."
"Him, you bonehead. You hear him in your head. His is the only personality in that jumbled mess that can calm you down."
"I love how you're so sensitive to my feelings, Sparky."
"Dude, you know you want the big lug. Just let him in." Jubilee's voice became more quiet and serious. "Yeah, he fucked up. But he told you he's sorry. And you can sense how much he wants you, right? A guy doesn't come back after five years just to screw someone, Rogue. He cares about you. Probably loves you."
"He just really hurt me, Jubes. Physically, it's like I found my other half. The feral side of me wants to run naked in the woods with the guy. But I don't know if I can trust him."
"Then take it slow. But don't shut him out; you need him as much as he needs you."
Rogue smiled. She was grateful for a friend like Jubilation Lee. "You always tell it like it is."
"Someone's gotta keep you honest, girl. Just watch yourself. I'll see you in few weeks after exams, okay?"
"Can't wait. The mall here is in need of some serious damage."
"I'll bring my platinum card and a UHaul truck."
"Thanks, Jubes. Love you, firecracker."
"Love you too, redneck."
~oOo~
A few hours after her conversation with Jubilee, Rogue was in the Danger Room, working on a training session with some of the more advanced students.
"Colossus, now!"
Rogue watched as the Russian threw a metal pole at the Sentinel's head. It lodged in the robot's eye socket and she used it as a lever to tear the side of its head away from its body.
"Boomer, you're up!"
The young boy stepped forward, spread his arms wide and then forced them back together, expressing a massive wave of energy. The Sentinel's body shuddered and exploded.
Scott and Logan watched the action from the Danger Room control booth. Both of them were focused more on Rogue than the actual dynamics of the battle.
"She's good." There was a note of pride in Logan's voice.
The team leader nodded. "Yes. She's damn good." He paused, choosing his next words carefully. "But she's becoming more unpredictable."
"How?"
"Before she took Miss Marvel's powers, Rogue could call upon her mutations quickly and efficiently. She was like a surgeon in battle. Now, her control is all over the place. She might want to call up on Magneto's power, but there will be a sudden surge and she'll explode something with fire."
"Dammit."
"You can see that she's only limiting herself to Carol's powers right now. She's afraid to hurt the children."
"What the hell can we do?"
"According to Charles, there's nothing we can do."
"That ain't good enough."
The door opened as Logan finished speaking. Hank entered the room, smiling from ear to ear.
"She's controlling them."
Both men turned to the large, blue doctor and responded in unison. "What?"
"The tests. I ran them five different ways. There's something changing, reversing the encroachment of her powers."
Logan spoke first. "But she said she still hears the voices."
"Yes, yes, I'm sure she does. But for a moment the other day, during her confrontation with Jean…"
"What the fuck happened with Jean?" Logan was not going to let Jean get away with bullying Marie. Not in the slightest.
Hank was unprepared for their reactions and attempted to minimize the tension with a wave of his massive, furry hand. "Oh, well, they had a little argument in the medical lab. But the important issue is that during that state of heightened anger, here, you can see it on the brain scan, she was able to suppress her mutations."
Scott was about to speak when a scream erupted from the Danger Room. The three men ran to the window and saw Rogue plummeting to the ground, clutching the side of her head.
~oOo~
She awoke in the med lab, once again listening to the faint beep of the machines. As her eyes slowly opened, she inhaled a familiar scent and turned to see Logan asleep in a chair next to her bed. He stirred and her heart clenched at the sight of him. She wanted to be angry; to dredge up those feelings of abandonment and loneliness. It would help her push him away. But when she saw him in that window the first day he arrived, her primal nature stirred; the senses and abilities absorbed from Logan all those years ago weren't just a mutation to switch on and off. They were an essential part of her now and something inside was calling for Logan. It was an awareness she hadn't noticed until recently. Her feral side wanted a companion and she was pretty sure it had chosen him.
"My dear Rogue, it is good to see you awake."
Hank whispered, trying not to wake up Logan.
"How long have I been out?"
"Let's see, it is twelve am.…almost fourteen hours."
She wasn't sure she'd heard him correctly. "Fourteen hours?"
"Yes, my dear."
"Hank, I haven't slept for more than two hours at a time in almost a year."
"I know. What do you remember?"
Rogue sat up and became aware of Logan's eyes on her. He was listening intently.
"I was running through the simulation and Carol became more vocal in my head. The others started to come out as well, but then…the wolverine surfaced. Carol became enraged and that's when the pain started. I couldn't focus, she was everywhere. Then…I was here."
"Yesterday, after you left, I went through your tests. Rogue, you are beginning to show signs of control over Carol and the other mutations."
Rogue didn't know how to respond.
"I don't know exactly how, but it is there. Your unconscious state today may have been a response to your mind beginning to express control. A state of…mental hibernation, if you will. You should go see the Professor when you feel up to it."
"Yeah, I'll do that, Hank. Thanks. Can I go?"
"Most certainly."
Logan stood up and helped Rogue off the table. "You want to get changed, darlin'? Your clothes are over there."
"No. Just grab me one of the robes. I need a shower. And a beer. Or two. Or four."
"You can do the first thing while I go get a case of the other."
"Deal."
~oOo~
Scott closed the door to the med lab and was turning to walk away when he came face to face with Jean.
"Eavesdropping, Scott?"
"No, Jean. I just came to check on Rogue."
"Oh. And how is our precious time bomb doing?"
Scott was saddened at how little he felt he knew the woman he once loved with all his heart. She was someone he didn't recognize anymore.
"You don't need to be so cruel."
She twisted around and there seemed to be a flash of genuine remorse on her face. "You're right, Scott. We all have our burdens to bear, I suppose."
He began walking down the hallway when her voice rose from behind him. "She won't choose you. Not with Logan back."
"Shut up Jean."
"Just want you to be realistic about your chances."
He didn't bother to turn around. "Well, if there's no chance for me and Rogue, then there's sure as hell no chance for you and Logan."
He heard her huff angrily before he turned the corner and went up the stairs.
~oOo~
Rogue had just finished getting dressed when she heard a knock at her door. She assumed it was Logan with the beer.
"Come in!"
As she stepped into the bathroom to get a clip for her damp hair, she called out again. "Just put them on the bed. I hope they're cold."
"Sorry, I don't come bearing gifts, cold or otherwise."
Rogue came out of the bathroom to see Scott standing in her doorway.
"Scott! I'm so sorry, I thought you were Logan with my desperately needed beer. What's going on?"
"Oh, nothing. I just wanted to see how you were."
"You mean after my coma? I'm feeling a bit better. I guess sleep will do that for you."
He shifted slightly and took a tentative step forward. She didn't notice it at first, but she could make out the aroma of alcohol mixing with his anxious, musky scent.
"Scott what's wrong."
He brought his face up and she could tell he was scanning her with his eyes. But where she normally felt a calming presence from Scott, now his gaze held an edge.
"I wanted to see you. I was worried."
She smiled. "I'm doing fine, really."
Scott took another step forward and she could tell he wanted to reach for her. Holy hell this was awkward. Just two weeks ago, she probably would have embraced him and now, well, now there was Logan.
"You've had a rough time of it lately. Your powers, Logan showing up and what happened today…it's a lot to handle." He shook his head. "I'm rambling. Look, I'm just…I'm here for you, okay?"
"I know, Scott. You've been the best friend I could ever ask for."
Once again, she felt his eyes boring into hers. "Is that all I am? Just a friend?"
"Scott…"
The pause and drop in her voice was enough to make Scott take two steps backward, almost knocking into the bookshelf. "God, I'm sorry. I never should have come. It was stupid of me…"
"Scott, it's alright."
She took a step toward him but he lifted his arm, his palm outstretched in her direction.
"No, it's not alright. You're going through hell right now. The last thing you need is me coming in here and trying to stake a claim on you." He rubbed his head and she could tell this conversation was quickly sobering him up. "Look, Rogue. You know I care about you. A lot. I just wanted you to know that in case…well, I just wanted you to know."
She wasn't quite sure what to say. "I do, Scott."
"Okay…night then."
He left quickly and she slumped down on the bed, not really knowing how to feel about the fact that one of her friends was in love with her. A friend who, had Logan not returned, might have been sharing her bed.
"This is so bizarre." She wanted to laugh at the irony of the untouchable girl being the recipient of affections from two very hot men but, in her present situation, she didn't find it as amusing as she would have in the past.
She heard the sound of Logan's boots coming down the hallway. For just a second, the rhythm stopped before resuming a faster pace. He reached her door and the scowl on his face mirrored his feelings perfectly.
"What the fuck was Scott doin' in your room?"
"Now that's really none of your business."
He entered her room and put the six pack of beer on her bed. "I think it sure as hell is."
Rogue stood up. "Why? What gives you the right to police my life, Logan?"
"I ain't policin' your life. Just want to know if you and Scooter are…dammit Rogue…" The scent of his anger was quickly overshadowed by confusion. Logan was struggling with his next words. "Do you want him?"
She crossed her arms and let the silence wind him up for just a minute. She closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose to ward of an impending headache. Slowly she put her hand down and looked at the man standing in front of her.
"Logan, Scott's been a good friend. We've been there for each other for five years and he's done a lot for me since Carol."
"That ain't answerin' my question."
"I care about him, Logan. And if you hadn't shown up here, yes, I probably would have wanted to be with him."
"If I hadn't shown up?"
"God, Logan, don't play this game."
"It ain't a game to me, darlin'."
"Well, I feel like I'm in the middle of some cosmic tennis match. I'm exhausted, in pain most of the time and now I have to deal with the two of you in some pissing match over me. I can't take it anymore, okay?"
"You want me to go?"
The increased throbbing in her head was making her irritable and Logan was on the receiving end of her ire.
"That would be the easy route for you, wouldn't it? It's kind of your M.O. Things get difficult and you take off and nurse your wounds. Well, do it. Go. You said you're sorry, did your penance and made amends, alright? Go wherever you want."
Now he was angry. Wolverine angry. "Fuck all, Rogue, I didn't come here to do penance! I came back here because it's the only damn place I ever felt like I belonged. And that was because you were here." He was pacing now, the words coming like a torrent. "I thought of you all the damn time. Hopin' you were safe, growin' up with a life I never would have been able to give you. I came back for you, alright? Not because of some goddamn obligation. Because I need you."
He stopped and looked at her, his eyes still fierce and enraged. "If you want Scott, I'll back off. But not because I don't want you. Because I want what will make you happy. For once in my sorry ass life I want to do the right goddamn thing."
The tears were flowing down her face and as she looked into his eyes, she knew he was being completely honest. That frightened her most of all. Rogue simply didn't know how to deal with the emotions surging inside of her. She remembered Jubilee's words to her and tried to open up instead of running out the door. Her shoulders slumped and her hands went limp at her sides as she sat back down on the bed.
"I don't know what to say, Logan. I just don't know. For five years I've resented you every day for leaving. I even convinced myself I hated you." She finally decided to let go of the feelings that had been left for too long. "But then you show up and as soon as I look at your face, it's like I can see the other half of me that's been missing all this time. I don't want you to go. I want you here with me."
"Darlin'."
She pointed her finger at his chest. "Don't get me wrong, I'm still pissed…and hurt. You weren't here when I needed you the most. I've spent the last year being physically and mentally tortured and you were nowhere to be found. I want to believe that you care…that you'll be here when I need you. I just don't fully trust you yet."
He moved to the bed and took up the space next to her. "I don't blame you, Rogue. I've been a spectacular asshole. But I'm back 'cause I want to earn that trust again. I guess the only way I know to do that is to take care of you. Protect you. Sometimes I get carried away, you know? I'm not exactly the calm and quiet type."
Logan put his hand under her chin and lifted her face to meet his. "But I ain't gonna run this time, Rogue."
His lips were nearly upon hers when the familiar searing pain shot through Rogue's head and neck.
Carol had picked a hell of a time to show up.
~oOo~
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