For an instant, hearing Cody speak her name catapulted Marie back to being seventeen. She'd loved Cody so desperately and, in that moment, she remembered the sweet, innocent moments with him; stolen kisses behind the bleachers, the notes she put in his backpack, holding hands during a movie. His voice also evoked memories of the darker times; kisses that were too rough, his strong hand yanking her arm when she turned away during a fight, his wandering eye when a pretty girl walked by. Marie had stayed with Cody because she wanted someone to care for her, even if it meant putting up some of his 'faults'. That was why, despite his drunken state, she'd allowed him into her room that night.
Marie spent years blaming herself for Cody's actions. She'd never won the 'what if' game – what if she had been stronger and sent him away? What if she'd broken up with him the first time he physically hurt her? What if…
It wasn't my fault.
She watched Cody speak to Miss Lila, hand her a clipboard and say something to an elderly gentleman sitting on an exercise bench. He turned and made his way toward her, his boyish smile replaced by a mask of tension. Marie saw Cody regard Logan briefly with his eyes but it was only fleeting; Cody's attention remained firmly on her. He crossed the room quickly and Marie felt her head spin slightly when he stopped just a few feet away. He smiled wanly.
"Anna. Didn't think I'd see you again."
Marie nodded. "I figured it was time. Didn't think you'd be…awake."
"Came out of the coma about four years ago."
She didn't quite know how to respond, the shock of seeing him conscious stunned her to silence. Marie looked him over; he hadn't changed much at all. His hair was longer than the tight cut he used to sport. The length was flattering, softening the angular lines of his face. She could still see in him the boy that made her heart flutter with excitement. Cody turned his attention to Logan. He extended his hand.
"Cody Robbins."
Logan didn't accept the offer, he simply stood in place and, when Cody realized his gesture would not be reciprocated, lowered his hand. As if that horrible night seven years ago wasn't hanging in the room between them, Cody nonchalantly turned and gestured for Marie and Logan to follow. "Let's go outside."
They followed him through the now-familiar hallways and out a back door that held a sign that read, "Staff Only." The small patio was empty. Cody moved to the corner and leaned up against the back wall, crossing his arms over his chest. Marie walked to the side and Logan hung back, close to the door. She could tell he wanted to give her space but remain close enough to slice Cody into confetti should he make a wrong move.
"So…you work here?" Marie wanted to sound strong and in control but, to her, the voice that emitted from her throat was weak and high-pitched.
"Yeah. I finished rehab pretty quickly and they offered me a job. Even helped pay for school."
"That's good. I'm glad to see you're doing okay."
"Yeah, I'm doin' okay." His brow wrinkled in genuine confusion. "Why'd you come back, Anna?"
Because what you did gave me nightmares. Because I can't move on with my life until I tell you that what happened scarred me for life. Because I trusted you and you shattered that trust into a million pieces.
"I needed to put the past behind me."
Cody shifted and looked at the ground. Even without using Logan's senses, she could tell he was nervous. The Cody she used to know was never uncomfortable in any situation. If this conversation had happened seven years ago, he would have been immediately defensive and aggressive. This person was different. He simply stood there, waiting and unsure of what to do next.
Marie stepped forward. "I let you into my room that night because I loved you. I thought you loved me. But what you did…I still have nightmares, Cody."
"I have nightmares too." His voice shook with emotion. "But the real nightmare was reliving everything I'd ever done to you every moment I was in that coma. I wasn't awake but I wasn't really asleep either. That's what people don't understand. I could hear people who came to visit me. My parents were pissed that you'd attacked me. Your parents were ashamed that you were a mutant. But alone in that bed, what I did to you played over and over in my head. I remembered how scared you were when you realized what I was gonna do. But I didn't stop. I was drunk and angry at my goddamn father and I took it out on you. The one person who'd only ever loved me and I hurt you."
Cody looked up and Marie saw the anguish in his eyes. The tears rolled down Marie's face. It was only through the sheer force of her will that she could prevent herself from breaking down completely.
"At first I was mad about what you'd done. But as time wore on, I realized that it was my own damn fault. I deserved every second of the hell I went through in the coma. When I came out of it, I took it as a sign that I'd gotten a second chance. My parents wanted me to get my GED then to go law school like they wanted. But I said no. I had to give back – make up for all the stupid shit I'd done in my life. So I stayed here." He laughed softly. "Even have an apartment in a guest place out back."
That explains why we thought he was still in a coma – this was listed as his address.
"I can never say sorry enough for what I did to you, Anna Marie. But I am. So damn sorry."
It was those words that caused her resolve to break. She felt her knees begin to buckle and then, instantly, Logan's arms were around her, gently depositing her onto one of the patio chairs. The sobs came and, for several minutes, the only sound was that of her gasping for breath. Logan remained on his knees next to her, rocking Marie gently back and forth as she cried.
Her breathing finally calmed and Marie was able to turn her attention to Cody, who stood with his head bowed, staring at the ground once again.
"I didn't mean to hurt you, Cody."
"I know."
Marie wiped her eyes, unsure of what to say next. "Thank you for saying what you did. I wish I could tell you that I forgive you…"
"Don't." Cody stepped forward and held out his hand. "I don't expect that. I just want you to know that I am sorry."
Logan's arm remained around her shoulder as she stood up. She tilted her head and nodded. Logan stepped aside and let her move closer to Cody. She stood there, in front of the boy – now man – who had haunted her dreams for so long. He looked so lost and forlorn, the visage of the self-confident, cocky boy replaced by a humble and mature person.
"Thank you, Cody."
"I don't deserve thanks, Anna."
"Yes, you do. You could have given in to anger; let it poison you. Trust me; I know a thing or two about that. You did something terrible, but at least you changed for the better because of it. That night cost us both and we've paid the price. Now, it's time to move on."
She smiled and he returned it in kind. They stood for a moment in silence, no longer the Cody and Anna Marie of the past.
"I'm glad you came back."
"Me too, Cody."
Marie felt Logan step up behind her and put his hand on her shoulder. She nodded and smiled at Cody but before she could turn toward the door, Logan extended his arm. Wordlessly, Cody put his out in return and the two men shook hands. Relief descended upon Cody's face.
The brief contact ended and Logan guided Marie around, moving to the exit. Logan pulled open the door and walked Marie back through the hallways and out the front door, giving a quick "Thank you" to the receptionist on the way out. They paused together as they reached the car, Marie turning slightly to give one final glance at the building before leaving.
"You okay, baby?"
She moved her body flush with Logan's and wrapped her arms around his torso, tucking her head into that now familiar niche alongside his neck. The demon had been exorcised.
Marie kissed his skin and looked up into his beautiful eyes. "Yeah. I think I'm finally okay."
The corners of his eyes crinkled with his soft smile and he bent down to place a feather-light kiss on her forehead. He walked her to her car door and opened it – still old school, my Logan– and as she slid into the seat she knew that this had only been the first step in her journey to face her past. Now it was time for the second step.
Now it was time to visit her parents.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Thank you to doctorg for her beta!