oOo
Logan slipped out of Marie's room before dawn to get them some coffee and breakfast. Marie was asleep when he left. Based on the depth of her breathing, he figured she would be out at least another hour. She'd slept soundly most of the night and the few times she stirred, Logan found himself on the edge of his chair, ready to wake her from a nightmare. It was only after she'd settled back down and was breathing regularly again that he let himself relax even slightly.
They were going to have a talk when she woke up. Marie was probably not going to be happy about it. Hell, I'm not going to be happy about it. But it was long overdue. Logan silently cursed himself for being so wrapped up in his own stupid shit that he never even saw the signs. All night he'd replayed interactions with her over in his head. In light of what he now knew, so many things made perfect sense. A real friend would have paid attention. A real man would have protected her.
But he hadn't. For almost two years, he'd pushed Marie away. After Jean and Scott married, Logan allowed himself to wallow in self-loathing. There were so many excuses he came up with to isolate himself from Marie; he was too old, she was too young, his past, she deserved better. It was all bullshit. Logan was simply a coward. And that cowardice had cost Marie dearly. Not anymore.
Logan turned the corner and stepped into the kitchen where he was stopped by the sight of Remy LeBeau sitting at the counter, drinking a cup of coffee. Shit. Logan didn't bother with a greeting and moved around, gathering mugs, plates and enough food that Logan and Marie could talk without needing to leave her room for a while.
"Breakfast for two Logan?"
Logan didn't respond.
"Make sure to get some of dem energy bars an' hard boiled eggs. Chere like to load up on protein before her workout."
Logan bristled at LeBeau's not so subtle implication that the Cajun knew Marie better than Logan did.
"I know what she likes."
LeBeau leaned back on the stool. "Really, now? Don' seem to me you know her much at all, homme."
Logan stopped and turned to face LeBeau. "I've known Marie a lot longer than you."
"Just 'cause Marie lived here a long time don' mean you know her. She got a lot of secrets, dat woman. An' some of dem eatin' her up inside."
Remy stood up, placed his coffee cup in the sink and headed for the door.
"Then why ain't you helpin' her, LeBeau. Seems to me that her boyfriend should be mannin' up and lookin' out for her."
LeBeau shrugged. "Not her boyfriend, no more. She wouldn't let me close. Mebbe she still waitin' for you."
Logan recalled Jubilee's words.
"It's not Remy she worries about on missions. It's not Remy's dogtags she clutches while waiting for word about the team. It's not Remy's name she whimpers when she has a nightmare. And it sure as hell isn't Remy that could hurt her so badly."
"I hope you can help her, Logan. 'Cause if you can't, I afraid we gonna lose belle femme forever." LeBeau took a step forward and paused before exiting the room. "An' even though she love you, I still love her. If you what she needs, den I gladly step aside."
LeBeau's head shifted and although Logan could only see the side of Remy's face, his words were as intense as if he'd been staring Logan down.
"But if you can't help, Remy gonna turn on all his charm to save her, Logan. Rogue is more important than either of us."
With that, he left the kitchen with Logan standing in the dim light alone. Logan was stunned. For all of his annoyingly obvious charm, Remy LeBeau was actually a good guy. A good guy that loved Marie and only wanted the best for her. That wasn't comforting.
Logan gathered up the rest of the food and dishes and headed back to Marie's room.
It was time to put all the cards on the table. Logan just hoped he had a winning hand.
oOo
He arrived at Marie's room carrying a tray of coffee and food – including hard boiled eggs and a protein bar. Logan may be stubborn but he wasn't completely stupid. When he spied the skewered lock, Logan made a mental note to give Xavier some cash to replace it. Balancing the tray on one hand, he quietly entered Marie's room and saw that her bed was empty. On instinct, he remained still and was rewarded with the sound of the faucet running.
Logan put the tray on her small desk and poured himself some coffee. He sat in the same chair he'd occupied for almost five hours – thank God it was comfortable – and began running through options of how to broach the conversation with Marie. Before he could think of something that sounded remotely coherent, the bathroom door opened and out stepped Marie. She was dressed in a pair of running pants and a long sleeved shirt.
"Mornin'. Brought some breakfast."
"Why are you here, Logan?"
"We need to talk."
"No, we don't."
She went to her dresser, pulled out a pair of socks and sat on the bed to put them on.
"Yeah, we do."
Marie sighed and rubbed her eyes. The exhaustion in her face did little to mar her stunning beauty.
"Logan, what happened last night was none of your business. I had a bad dream. Not the first and not going to be the last. Move on."
She stood up and walked back into the bathroom. Logan stayed in the chair and debated on whether or not to follow her in. Probably a bad idea.
"Marie, you're rail thin and you look like you haven't slept in a year. You need to talk to someone."
The laughter that rang from the bathroom was hollow and laced with sadness.
"Someone like you?"
That made Logan get up off his ass. He went to the doorway – the same place he'd stood last night when his world shifted sideways – and watched as Marie finished putting her hair in a ponytail.
"Yeah, someone like me. You've got to talk about it."
Logan braced himself for the onslaught of her anger. When Marie got going, she could really let it fly. But it was more disturbing to him to see Marie put her hands on the counter and bow her head. He knew that look. When she first came to the mansion, Marie would often hang her head when she was afraid or unsure during her training. He'd pushed her hard because he knew she could do what was being asked. But he also knew that if she didn't push hard, she would succumb to her fears. And that's exactly what she was doing now.
"No, Logan, I don't have to talk about it. Especially with you. I think you made yourself perfectly clear two weeks ago."
"Dammit, I was upset..."
She cut him off with a wave of her hand.
"Logan, what's done is done. Now I've got things to do."
"You're dyin' inside, Marie. I want to help."
Marie turned to face him as she put her gloves in her pocket. Her eyes were blazing with fury.
"You want to help? You've pushed me away and ignored me for two years and now you want to help? Too little too late, Logan."
She took a step forward and Logan stepped in front of her, blocking the doorway.
"Marie, please."
"Move."
"Darlin'…."
Marie's head whipped up and she raised her hand in front of him.
"Don't call me that. You don't have the right."
It was then he smelled the salt and saw her eyes begin to well up with tears. He could hear the catch in her breath as she spoke.
"I don't need you."
She couldn't have hurt him more if she'd slapped him.
Logan stepped aside for her to pass. He heard her pick up a few things before she left the room, shutting the door firmly on her way out.
He was failing her all over again.
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Author's Chapter Notes:
Well, we're fully into angst territory now! In case you didn't pick up on it, Marie is about 24 in this story. X1 has taken place but after that it's all my twisted creation.
Thanks for the reviews- I really do love hearing what you think (good or bad).
Continued thanks to doctorg for her beta work!
Thanks for the reviews- I really do love hearing what you think (good or bad).
Continued thanks to doctorg for her beta work!
Chapter End Notes:
Your reviews keep the muses happy!