Author's Chapter Notes:
A/N: 1.
Working title- And the hits keep on comin’. *cheesy porn music* Seriously. This chapter has no redeeming literary purpose whatsoever. You’ve had a feral Logan, with a “Cured” Marie, a heartsick Logan trying to connect with Marie albeit one-sidedly, and now? Now you have a lovesick Logan with a mutation-fully-realized, completely independent almost-died yesterday, virgin-except-for-that-one-time- Marie.



I have a checklist. :D



A/N: 2
Gonna have to ask you to suspend your disbelief when it comes to me (a Floridian who puts on a sweatshirt and slippers if it gets below 70) describing the wilds of the Yukon Territories. Since you’re already reading a fic about mutated superheroes, hopefully anything I get too wrong won’t be a deal breaker. That being said, I had some help from friends- fooloshnotionsone who lives in Canada and another who lives in Alaska. Thank them for putting up with all my dumb questions, but anything I got wrong is because I like to play what if too much. :D

Logan

Marie’s head lulled a little against the passenger-side window with the motion of the SUV. She sighed a little, wrinkling her nose in her sleep, and shifted to get more comfortable.

Seeing her like this brought back so many memories.

Instead of driving from the wilds of Canada, the quiet, starving runaway sleeping next to me, I had a young woman who was. . . utterly exhausted. She’d been gone for months, and I knew there was a bit left to talk about- if I could kill that fucker Stryker over again, I would- but for now, the fact that she was finally able to sleep filled me with a warm contentment.

I really wasn’t used to that.

Getting out of the facility had been relatively easy enough, after Jean had gone through it like a wrecking ball. What organization there was had been half-assed at best. Hell, the guy that I’d thought I’d have to intimidate into pissing himself had practically given me the keys to huge, boxy vehicle and babbled to me about there being supplies in the back. Anticipation had been high when we’d made our break for it, searching for proof that they were following us by land or air. Eventually, Marie had made me pull over and keep watch as she looked for GPS devices, deeply distrusting the idea that Stryker’s people weren’t doing something to track us.

Shit, it’s not like I blamed her.

I didn’t get cold, not really, but Marie definitely did, and the fact she was wearing thin cotton and had no shoes had me jacking the SUV’s heat up as high as it would go. The winter parka I’d found in the back and bundled her into swallowed her tiny frame up. The weather up here was a dry cold, and while I don’t think that anyone would be strolling around naked (well, okay. Not true. Canadians up this far north were crazy motherfuckers.), this was definitely an area where people enjoyed their solitude. There wasn’t much around these parts, except for tundra, although I could see the boreal forests were close enough. I don’t know what it was about bad dudes and choosing remote facilities smack dab in the middle of the fuckin’ far north, but it wasn’t remote enough for only helicopter access and the SUV was equipped for weather in the Northern Territories, so I knew that soon enough the access roads would bleed over into highway. GPS would get me the rest of the way, once I was able to pick up a signal.

The access roads bumped onto the highway with a thump and a drag of the snow tires. I was glad to hit pavement, if just so that Marie’s head wasn’t knocking around the damn window so much. I squinted a little; a vague idea of where I wanted to go taking shape now that the cautious feeling of finally being free of that fuckin’ place was more of a reality. A few hours passed in silence, the landscape slowly changing the further south I went.

Soon enough, there were signs of a town, and I’d been around this area enough to know where I was. Yellowknife was the biggest city in these parts. Had some great fishing, but this wasn’t exactly a vacation. Even the idea of being around people made me almost itch with nerves.

It was quiet as I headed northeast, then slightly southwest towards Fort Providence. I was going to need to stop to fill up with the gas cans in the back of the SUV, anyway, and was getting a little concerned that Marie hadn’t woken yet. With everything that had gone on with her mind, and in her mind, I had thoughts of getting her to a hospital. Almost as though she heard me, she shifted a little, making a snuffling, sleepy noise, and settled back into her sleep.

I rolled my eyes at the ridiculous way my heart turned over in my chest.

I pulled over to the side of the road- habit more than necessity ‘round here. If I saw more than three cars this whole time I’d been driving, I would have been shocked. At least it was too cold to snow. I turned off the engine so I could fill up. Marie didn’t twitch, but her heartbeat was still calm, so I got out quickly so not to let too much of the wind in the vehicle and walked around the back. I poked through one of the bags back there and saw that it was packed with some water and what looked to be snacks, a Glock and two clips of ammo, some credit cards and some Canadian currency. In another bag were some emergency blankets. I tossed the credit cards and kicked some snow over them, shoved the Glock back into the bag. It wasn’t like neither of us needed a weapon, and as much as it appealed to the asshole in me to just toss it, with my luck some stupid kid would find it and that’d be on me. It only took a few minutes to fuel up. I could probably fill the tanks one more time, but since I now had cash, this wasn’t as much of an issue.

I grabbed some of the food and water, then jogged around to the front. I had no idea when Marie had last eaten, but she was still asleep. I started the SUV, pulled out onto the road and continued.

Years ago, when I’d told Wheels where I wanted to live, the old bastard had had the audacity to roll his eyes at me, and the chiding voice in my head reminded me that too much isolation wasn’t good for me. I knew that I had to have someplace to go though, and the Yukon Territory was about as rugged and isolated as I could get.

The Professor had been paying me a ridiculous sum of money for years, so I had two places we could go and not be disturbed. Both were as different from each other as possible. Neither were cheap, but they were safe, and mine, and now I knew they’d give her some time to catch her breath before we had to go back to New York.

Since I wasn’t flying in, we had to loop down into Alberta, and over to BC and north again. In the thirty plus hours it took to drive, we stopped four times. Marie barely woke up, although I did finally talk her into moving to the back seat so that she’d be a little more comfortable as she slept. I was appalled at the fact that she didn’t even have shoes. I vaguely remembered that she’d had some sort of paper stockinged things when we were running through the facility, but they must not have made it through the snow to get to the SUV. My boots would swim on her feet, but I did take off my socks and put them over hers, rubbing them a little. Sher skin wasn’t too cold, but Jesus Christ. She’d freeze to death if I wasn’t careful. She ate a little, drank a little, stopped a few times for me to carry her to the bathroom so she wouldn’t have to walk in the snow and ice, but otherwise, Marie just slept. I was still too wired to be tired, so I didn’t mess with a motel or anything, preferring to just get there.

My place was in an unincorporated area, west of the Yukon River, about 40 miles from Dawson. About what felt like a thousand years ago, Cyclops had owed me a favor, and I collected it by having him help me clear some land so I could build my house. I couldn’t build it into the mountain- that would be a total bitch to insulate- but the woods around my strip of land were overgrown and wild, built up as it was right against some of the protected lands. I knew that there were satellites that could find me, and Wheels could have pretty much found anyone, anywhere, but aside from one very small road and the airstrip I’d hidden as much as I could, no one knew where the house was.

The thought made me frown. Now with the two of them, the Professor and Scott both dead, no one knew I lived there. Oh, I showed up to Dawson once every six months or so, picked up bullshit mail I sent to myself at my post office box, bought up the store and mostly ignored the locals, who were more than happy to ignore me. I had packages sent there, and had dropped enough hints about most of my goods being flown in that no one really asked. Had a few beers and kept myself to myself. Of course, they were a pretty tight-knit bunch. I don’t think they really gave a shit, since I didn’t give them a reason to. To them, I was just some guy they saw occasionally; albeit one who was a tad more unsociable than most. I might have encouraged the rumor that I was former military, and tended to travel a lot. Not entirely false anyway.

Either way, me showing up in the little town would raise no eyebrows.

I had a similar place in Japan, but I didn’t go there anymore. Not after Mariko. Habit had me looking over at Marie, and I shut my eyes for a moment, taking in the calming sound of her heartbeat.

I stretched a little, then popped my neck. I was getting a little tired, but we weren’t far now. I knew from experience it would take a couple of hours in the town to stock up. My alternative was dropping Marie off into a frigid house, going through and making sure everything was warm enough for her, and then coming back. It probably wasn’t healthy, but I just really didn’t want to be away from her that long.

I stopped once more to squirm into the extra set of winter gear. I hadn’t exactly planned my wardrobe for an extended stay during the Canadian winter. I’d been wearing jeans and my tank under a jean jacket, with my boots. The wind was bitter cold, and my underdressed state would make me stick out like a sore thumb as some kind of schmuck from the lower 48. Funnily enough, the bloodstains on my clothes would be less remarkable than the lack of winter gear.

“Log’n?”

I turned. Marie had sat up and was stretching, yawning a little. Her hair was a mess, somehow managing to be completely flat on one side yet still stick out in every direction. I was so glad to see her awake that I could only blink stupidly.

She smiled sleepily and reached out. The coat gaped open and I was glad that she was snug inside the warm car, because she was still wearing only the scrubs she’d been in when I found her.

For fuck’s sake, she didn’t even have shoes. The thought kept repeating in my mind, as though I had somehow managed to fail her by not dressing her properly during the grand escape plan.

“Hi, kid. We’re almost to my house. Gotta pick up some supplies first though, and since you’re not exactly dressed for the weather, I’m going to need you to stay here.”

“Oh.” She sounded disappointed. She yawned. “Wait, you have a . . . house?”

“Yeah.”

“And I’m guessing that this is still. . . Canada?”

“The Yukon Territory, to be exact. We can pretty much spit out the window and be in Alaska.” Well, not exactly. More like drive several miles, spit, and then be in Alaska, but close enough. I tugged my winter clothes in place, ignored the stifling heat of the vehicle, put the SUV in gear and drove into town.

The town looked like it would have done during the first Gold Rushes up this way. In fact, people still mined for gold, looking to strike it rich. That and outdoor tourism kept the area alive during the summer months, but things looked pretty quiet now as I pulled into the post office.

“This is nice.”

“Yeah. Sorry you can’t get out and explore a little. Probably should have you come up here though. I’m gonna have the back open to load up, and you’re not exactly dressed warmly.”

“Al---” she yawned again. “Right.”

Marie climbed in front, bringing the blanket I’d given her with her, curling up on the seat and wrapping it around her. She also zipped up the coat, practically disappearing into its depths. I heard one of the wrappers rustling and for some reason, that made me grin a little. With the hood of the parka up, you couldn’t even see that she was a woman.

I got out as quickly as I could, trying not to let the heat out. Fortunately, the day was crisp and clear for miles. The bell above the door jingled cheerfully as I went to my PO Box, only to frown down at the lock. It wasn’t like I’d brought my keys.

Well, shit.

I reversed and got in line behind a woman who was talking on her phone. She concluded her business without acknowledging the woman behind the desk, which I thought was pretty rude and was one of the main reasons I didn’t much care for those cell phone things. People seemed to indulge their need to be self-involved. I rolled my eyes a little as she went on and on and on to whoever she was talking with, meeting the gaze of the clerk, Madge, who quickly hid a smile.

The woman left, still yacking away, and it was my turn. “Hey, Madge. Long time.”

“John! It’s good to see you! You’ve been outside, yeah? How can I help you?”

I forced an embarrassed smile. I was John Logan to these people, not Wolverine. My X-geek career was so far under wraps it was almost non-existent. It had taken me awhile to cotton onto the fact that when locals said ‘outside’ they meant ‘down in the lower 48’, not actually ‘outside’. “The damndest thing. Made it all the way here, and realized I don’t have the damned key to my box.” The truth, for what it was worth.

“Oh, that’s no trouble a’tall. You’ve got some deliveries too. Normally, I’d ask for an ID and all, but you’re lookin’ a bit worse for wear there.”

I raised my eyebrows. “It’s been a helluva few days, that’s for sure.” I moved off to the left, and she made a ‘just a minute’ gesture and disappeared to the back. Good thing everyone knew everyone here, or I’d be fucked. Wasn’t like I remembered to take my wallet with me. If she had insisted on identification, it would have gotten awkward.

Soon enough, the door opened, and she came through pushing several parcels on a little hand cart. “Here, I put the lose mail in this envelope for you. Last thing you need is to be chasin’ after your junk mail once that wind pops up.”

“I appreciate it.” I did. She made as though to help me, but the bell tinkled again and a few teenagers came in, giggling. “I can just get this in the truck. Bring back your cart in a jif!” I smiled again, and took the cart from her, wheeling it outside. I could have carried everything in one trip, but some of them were a little heavy, and I didn’t want to stick out any more than I had to. I put them in the back, noting that Marie was still in her little nest, and slammed the trunk shut. I couldn’t remember everything I’d had shipped; but, there was time enough to look at all that later. I gave the cart back to Madge with a nod, then got back in the SUV.

I headed over to Ravens next - the name made me smirk a bit, not gonna lie- and spent a few minutes on some jeans and sweaters that would fit Marie, some under things and a pair of boots. I had to guess at her sizes, but if we stayed here very long, we could always come back. It seemed incredibly important to me that I keep her out of the public’s eye; and never really took my eye off the SUV,even while shopping. I grabbed a few things for me, paid, and made my way back to the car. It was probably the quickest clothes shopping trip in recent history. My own instincts were screaming at me: get her safe, get her comfortable, get her away.

“Here. Hope it all fits.” I shoved the bag of clothes at her a little awkwardly, then shut the door behind me.

My last stop was the general store. They had damn near everything there, from fresh fruits and veggies to that fancy-ass organic coffee. I had a fully stocked pantry of dried goods, but I picked up some berries, carrots, celery, and onions, some milk and a few dozen eggs, some snacks and orange juice. They had fresh-cut bacon, and I picked up a few things that weren’t frozen on a whim, such as some steaks, some fish, and some chicken. I got some more toothpaste and a toothbrush, debated whether or not to get pads or tampons eventually just getting a pack of both because I’d sure as shit hate to not have anything if I were in her shoes, some deodorant, lotion, and feeling a bit skeevy, some rubbers. My cart was pretty full when I stopped suddenly, turned and went to the liquor aisle, and got some beer and wine. A lot of beer and wine.

“Wow, Mister. What time’s dinner?”

The pimply-faced kid at the checkout counter grinned cheekily at me, but the thought of this kid anywhere near my space made me unreasonably angry. Some of that must have showed on my face, because the grin drained off his face pretty damn quickly.

Shit. I didn’t want him thinking about me, even as that ‘asshole’ customer. I thought fast. “Er.. sorry. No, I’m trying to remember if I got everything. You got baked goods? Pies?”

“Um. On aisle four.”

“Aw thanks. You just saved my life. Come home without desert, and--” I mimed a knife cut across my throat, and the kid smiled a little.

“I’ll go ahead and start ringing you up.”

“Sure, just add in however many bags you need.” I jogged quickly to Aisle four and got two fresh-baked pies, two loves of bread, and some butter, then after some thought, a gallon of ice cream, then jogged back to my place in line. Another kid had wandered over and was carefully bagging my groceries in the recyclable bags, keeping all the perishables together. I paid with the cash we’d gotten from the SUV, and made my careful way to where the SUV sat, engine still idling, the bagger following closely behind.

It didn’t take me super long to put the several bags of groceries in the back of the car, and finally, finally was done with all the errands.

“Have a good day, mister!” The kid waved as he took the cart back to the store, and I raised my hand in a wave as I got inside, more than ready to drive off.

“Guess we’re stayin’ for a while, huh?”

“Thought it best to lay low for a bit. Didn’t really want people around.”

Marie flipped back her hood and nodded, shivering a little. She had ignored the rest of the clothes, but had stuck my socks back on her feet, under the boots I’d bought her.

“That’s fine. God, I feel like I haven’t slept in years . How long til we’re there?”

“‘Bout an hour.”

“Mm.”

I looked sharply at her, frowning again. I couldn’t help but be worried. She sounded like she was a few minutes from falling back asleep. I drove northwest, trying not to worry too much.

My house was as much off the grid as I could make it power-wise, without giving up the ability to use water whenever I wanted it. Hooking up to the city water as far out as I was hadn’t been cheap, but I’d been without running water for damn near half of my life and it was something I wasn’t gonna do without unless I had to.

Leaving Marie asleep against the passenger-side window again, I pulled into my garage. I stored the cut wood in the back, and there was just enough room for my Arctic Cat and the SUV to squeeze in there. I carefully didn’t shut the garage door all the way since I was leaving the vehicle running to keep her warm while I got the stoves going.

The Professor had insisted that I spare no expense when it came to weather proofing my little house. It was a log cabin style, but heavily insulated, with four rooms. Each room had a fireplace, while the kitchen had an old-fashioned, wood-burning stove that I used to heat most of the house. I quickly made sure that nothing had made its home in any of the flues while I’d been gone, then got all the fireplaces and the kitchen stove going. I was probably overdoing it a little, but I had the wood to spare, and I wanted to make sure that Marie was comfortable.

Once the temperature inside was a little less biting, I went back to the garage and shut the garage door, put down the strip of insulation for any drafts, then shut off the engine. She stirred a little when I gently took her into my arms, and curled into my body heat with a little mutter. I felt a pang when I drew down the covers with one hand, and set her in the center of my bed. It only took a moment to get her out of the coat and the boots and socks, but I left everything else, covering her up and checking that the fireplace hadn’t somehow gone out in the twenty minutes since I’d first lit it. Other than a wardrobe and the bed, there wasn’t much in here.

My bedroom wasn’t exactly lavish, but I had insisted on glass windows that I’d seen used in some of the swankier hotels in Sweden. They were thick enough, and sturdy enough to withstand just about everything, and the view was heart-stoppingly beautiful, with the snowy mountains and woods in the distance. I did have blinds for when the sun was shining directly into them, but since it was well into afternoon, I pushed them aside.

I left the door cracked open and went to unload the SUV as quietly as I could. The living area boasted a large couch and a chair in front of the fireplace. I didn’t have a tv, but I did have shelves and shelves of books. I’d put down some rugs to help with insulation of the floor, but most of it was bare wood. The kitchen had a large sink, and Beast had figured out the solar panels and a mix of a generator, but I didn’t use much electricity way up here. I had a small freezer that I could use if I was going to be here for awhile, but most of my meat was smoked or brined, and carefully stored in the pantry. I flipped the switch for the fridge and the water heater, but knew that neither would be ready for a bit, so it was easy enough to put the stuff that would go back out on the porch. I had a rocking chair there, and the three bags of perishables fit fairly well.

I had a small two-seater table in the kitchen that I’d made myself, and set the rest of the packages and groceries there so that I could put everything away in its proper place. I usually made my own food, so I had ample sugar, spices, and flour, and enough canned goods to feed an army.

I walked to the bathroom and did a quick check, pleased that it was warming up. I ran the water a little in here too, just to be sure the pipes were clear.

The other room was straight up indulgence, and I knew that as soon as she was able to stay awake for longer than three minutes strung together, Marie would love it. Originally, it had been for the Professor, should he ever visit. He never did, and I eventually stopped telling myself I’d done it for him. The door from the kitchen looked like it was going to the outside. Instead though, I’d made myself a little enclosed area. It was wall-to-wall glass, and I had even forked over the extra two hundred grand to make sure that the glass was heated and wouldn’t fog up, that the view would be unobstructed; unless it was snowing of course.

At the center of the room was a hot tub built right into the rock of the ground. It wasn’t huge, and was about 80% of the reason I’d been willing to pay the extra fines and fees to have access to city water. This was also my main and completely indulgent use of electricity. Jean had always been shocked at how quickly I healed, but I’d never really told her how much all the old wounds ached. And, if I wanted to relax with a cigar or three while buck-ass naked in my own hot tub, who the fuck was gonna stop me?

It was already nicely warm in here. I had a fireplace, but hadn’t lit it since the heat from the woodstove in the kitchen kept it pretty toasty. I primed the pump and filled the tub, adding the few chemicals that always made my nose burn for the first hour or so before they did their work, added the cover back and shut the door. It would be ready when she wanted it.

By now the fridge was cold, but the milk had almost frozen while outside. I muttered a little under my breath as I brought in everything and dug out a crock pot from the pantry. I added a bit of beef, some of the carrots, celery, onions, and some of the wine with a few peeled potatoes, and let everything start cooking together.

Eventually, I had run out of things to do. It was only about four in the afternoon, and I could hear that Marie was still sleeping peacefully in my bedroom, so I decided that it was more than overdue for me to take a shower.

I kicked off my clothes and groaned a little at the feel of the water on my back. Up til now I’d done a pretty damn fine job of ignoring everything that had happened- focused mainly on getting Marie safe. Now that I’d accomplished that, I let myself relax a little. I was still a little numb from actually gutting Stryker, but wasn’t naive enough to think that killing him solved the problem of the bullshit he’d raised with the cult of his. I knew, too, that I should let Storm know that Marie was okay, and with me, but I wasn’t really ready for the massive levels of bullshit dealing with all of them would bring.

I was so focused on my shower that I didn’t realize I wasn’t alone until she opened the curtain and stepped inside, as bold as brass, walking up to wrap her arms around my chest, burying her face between my shoulderblades.

“Hi.” I felt her smiling against my back.

“Hi.” I turned the shower a little warmer and turned in her arms so that we were facing each other. The water quickly made her look like a drowned kitten or something, and I bent down to kiss her nose, still a little freaked out that this was okay. It was painfully domestic, and I couldn’t help but wonder when she’d come to her senses and kick me the hell out- but she was making it real damn clear what she wanted.

Me.

I grabbed the shampoo and turned her so that her back was to the spray, lathering up and washing her hair for her. Marie stood there, completely trusting, and I took my time, still shocked that I could touch her like this at all. I had so many questions for her, for what had happened, but I also didn’t want to disturb this.

“Mmm. You could get a job doing this. Your hands are amazing.” She tilted her head back as I rinsed her hair.

“Nah.” I grabbed the soap and started washing her, keeping my touch light for now. What I wanted to do, and what she needed me to do was vastly different. “I think you’re enough for me.”

Her eyes popped open at that, and she looked darkly serious for someone who had a man’s soapy hands all over her arms. She didn’t say anything, instead closing her eyes with a little imperious nod, as though giving me permission to continue. I soaped her back, and her chest, her breasts, tummy and sides. I bent down to do her legs, and worked my way up to the top of her thighs, her round little butt, and everywhere in-between. Now I could hear her heartbeat, and smell the faint hints of her arousal. I guided her back to the water, rinsing everything carefully then bent down and kissed her gently.

“Can I wash you, too? I’ve uh-- never really gotten to before.”

I didn’t know if she meant that she’d never gotten the chance to explore my body, or if she’d never explored another man’s body, but I was more than on board. I wasn’t hard yet, but I knew I would be soon enough with her delicate hands sliding all over my wet body.

“Of course. Can’t say for sure how long the hot water heater is going to hold out though.”

“Oh, I think it will be fine.” She grinned a little wickedly, and if I wasn’t already head over ass in love with her, that little naughty grin would have probably done it. I handed her the soap and let her put me where she wanted me.

Her eyes darkened further when she saw me under the water, and since I didn’t have a damn ounce of shyness in my body, I opened my arms and let her look her fill. She soaped over my collar bone, over the muscles in my shoulders and down my arms. She kissed the soft flesh of my knuckles again and worked her way down my chest, scratching her nails over my hardened nipples, down through my chest hair, and over my hips.

My dick apparently also didn’t have an ounce of shyness and had hardened completely, causing her to make a little sound of shock. She reached out with one soapy finger and ran it along my length, and I flinched, shocked at the picture she made kneeling before me.

Jesus fuck, I had so many ideas.

Marie wrapped her hand around me and stroked, and I was struck by just how small her hands were. She moved her closed fist from root to tip, and once again, before sliding her slick hand down to my balls and thighs, soaping a little harder now, either nervous or unsure of her reception, and I realized that I had just been standing there like a complete idiot.

“Marie.” My voice was so low I had to try again. “Darlin’, as much as I hate to stop you, we have maybe three minutes before this water turns cold.”

“Mm,” she hummed absently, making a little turny motion with her finger. I turned and she wasted no time grabbing two handfuls of my ass and I could help but laugh out loud. “I’ve wanted to do that for a really long time.”

“Knock yourself--- ahhhh!”

She soaped me just as thoroughly as I had cleaned her, and I admit to have her touch me in places where I barely touched myself was a helluva turn on. She washed the back of my legs and I had just barely enough time to rinse off before the water started to get cold.

I got us some towels and dried her off completely, wrapping her long hair in another towel before I wrapped my own towel around my waist. My dick was still hard and it tented out the towel enough that I felt a little ridiculous, but when she carefully hung her towel over the shower curtain and walked naked back to my bedroom, I had to shake my head a little, unsure if I was dreaming or not.

She was looking out at the view when I walked in there, and the rays of red and gold from the sunset made her look like something out of a museum. Swallowing hard, I bent to stir up the fire so she’d be warm enough. I heard the pad of her feet on the floorboards as I straightened back up and she wrapped her arms around me, going up on tiptoe so that she could kiss me properly.

“Aw, Christ , Marie.” Having her naked against me made it hard to curb my baser instincts, which were to take. I stroked down her long back, setting my hands on her hips and kissed her back, trying to show her how much I wanted her.

She broke off the kiss a little breathlessly, stepping back and reaching to tangle her fingers with mine. “Come to bed, Logan.”

I did, laughing a little bit when she snagged the towel and threw it over the chair. I lay down on the bed and looked over at her, raising one eyebrow when I saw that her gaze was caught again by my cock.

“Can. . . can I?” The mattress dipped when she climbed up on it and she knelt next to me, reaching out a hand to rest on the center of my chest. I watched as she bit her lip, and I could almost smell the nerves.

“Darlin’, you can do anything that you want. Touch me everywhere. Do every little thing you’ve ever thought about. If I don’t like it, I’ll let you know, okay?”

“Oh- okay.”

Maybe I should have expected it given her fascination, but when she bent down to kiss the very top of my dick, I sucked in a shocked, serrated breath. She pulled away, and kissed it again, this time opening her mouth to taste.

Ohlordjesus, this girl was gonna kill me. I made a low, punched out sound and she pulled off of me. In the twilight darkness of the room, her voice was hushed, but I had no trouble hearing her.

“The first time we had sex was. . . overwhelming, and a little scary. But you never hurt me, Logan. Not even when you had all the reason to. The second time, in my apartment? You made it all about me, like you had something to make up for.” She kissed me again, slower, with her mouth more wet, then looked up at me to meet my shocked, widened gaze. “I’ve told you before, but you’ve never done anything that I didn’t want. Even now, with all this, you put me first.”

She got a little braver then, moving so the crown was fully in her mouth and sucking a little. I clenched my hands in the sheets, and tensed, a little embarrassed at how quickly I was ready to go off from her curious exploration of my body. She kissed down the length, and I shifted so my legs were open, shivering a little when she knee walked over my leg and made space for herself between them. From this angle, I could see her head, and her eyes, and the curve of her butt.

Braver now, she tried sucking again, bobbing her head a little. What she couldn’t fit in her mouth she worked over with her hands, until I had to cup her cheeks with both of my hands, guiding her sinful mouth away from me.

I had some slick in the drawer beside my bed, and while it didn’t taste like strawberries or coconut or whatever stupid shit people used to cover up the taste of sex, it would make it a little easier for her to stroke me.

“Oh! Sorry- didn’t think of that. I haven’t exactly had a lot of practice.” She grinned up at me and drizzled a little on the shaft of my dick, down over my balls and a little on my thighs, making a complete mess. She rubbed at it, massaging me, and I rumbled a little in my chest, feeling utterly relaxed and comfortable. Then what she said clicked and I shuddered at the wave of absolute jealousy that crashed over me. I knew it was stupid. She was here with me, now, and nothing she’d done with that dumbass kid should matter. Still though, that dark part of me growled low in his chest, and I reached down to her shoulders, bringing her up for a kiss that was just shy of brutal.

To my shock, her heartbeat actually sped up as she kissed back. I could see that I’d bruised her mouth a little and that her eyes were serious as she pulled away and moved back down between my thighs.

“I don’t like the taste of latex,” she said it offhand, and I knew. I fucking knew that she was completely clueless to the fact that the dark green monster was muttering deep inside my chest, clawing and snapping at the air, but I desperately, shamefully wanted to hear. I told myself that she was here with me, that she cared for me. She’d said it, all those weeks ago in that shitty apartment in Colorado. She wasn’t going to ever leave me. I knew it to be fact. But the petty jealousy still swam low in my gut, and I had to shut my eyes, ashamed of myself.

Her soft hands stroked around the mess of slick on my thighs, massaging, calming. The next time when she sucked me, the glide of her hands were smooth and slick and oh god, my toes curled as I felt the tension ratchet up as she grew more and more confident.

You don’t have any reason to be jealous, sugah.

I jackknifed up, almost bowling her over in my shock. I’d felt the Professor in my mind more times than I could count. He knew I didn’t care for it- and indeed he’d told me enough times that what had been done to me in Stryker’s bases over the years had made it hard for me to be attacked mentally. So, when I heard Marie’s sweet twang in my head just as clearly as if she’d been talking to me, it was quite a surprise.

Let me see?

I nodded- still awestruck that she was in my head. The idea of her with her mutation in control shocked me- I’d been so used to just touching her whenever and however I wanted while she was “Cured” that I hadn’t really thought much about it. I felt her then, a little clumsy at first, and then knowing and clear as she sifted through the dark, mean thoughts I was feeling, then mentally shrugged.

She tightened her slick grip and sucked harder, and I made that low, punched out sound again as she figured out how to move her mouth so that I occasionally hit the back of her throat.

“Marie,” I bit out, feeling my balls tighten closer to my body.

I tried this once with Bobby. It was awful, really. He didn’t seem to mind, but he was done right after and left. I felt her slick fingers stroke over my balls, lifting and tightening as she explored. She stopped sucking my cock and moved down with little tiny sucking kisses along the shaft, licking up the precome I’d spilled.

He also lasted about three seconds once I got my mouth on him. And not even on him, but on the condom.

I wanted to laugh, or pull away, but I was frozen there as though she’d pinned me, by her gentle touch and the relentless voice inside my head. I felt her move again, felt the light brush of teeth against the vein on the underside of my dick and clenched the sheets next to me so that I wouldn’t grab her head.

I’ve wanted to do this for awhile, Logan. Just about since I was a kid. I’ve wanted you so… much… .

She managed to suppress her gag reflex and go down another two inches, so that when her fist wrapped around the base of my cock, her lips touched the top of her delicate fingers.

I made a strangled sound; reflex had me bucking up into her mouth, into her throat, searching out more of that wet heat. I felt my trembling control snap and froze, jerking back on instinct so that I wouldn’t hurt her. I felt my the spasms as I came, once in her throat, once on her tongue and once on her lips and cheek.

I collapsed back onto the bed, shaking a little, stunned as limp from the strength of how hard I came. She— she— did that on purpose!

“Yeah. Fun though.” She maneuvered back so that she collapsed against my sweaty torso and grinned a little impishly at me. “You have no reason to be jealous. You were jealous with Gambit too. So yeah, I thought you could handle a little teasin’... and you handled it just fine.” She started to wipe her mouth but before she could, I kissed her, smearing it all over the both of us, which yeah. Okay, a little gross, but after that I had to rub as much of my scent on her as I thought she’d allow.

She laughed and I pulled her over on top of me. I kissed her again, and again, reaching down to cup her ass, then down a little further. I could feel how wet she was, her thighs a little sticky from either her sweat, my sweat, or her own juices.

She gasped a little when I lifted her, and her startled —“Logan?”— made me smirk. I felt her flail a little as I sat up, still holding her up as I shifted a little, then a little more, before turning and dropping her on the bed so that her head was on the pillows, her riot of wet hair fanning out beside her.

“I can’t do the fancy talk-in-your-mind shit- so if you don’t like what I’m about to do, you say so, okay?”

She just looked up at me and nodded, eyes wide. The white streak in her hair seemed to be glowing.

I spread her legs wide and just stared for a moment, possibilities running through my mind. Her legs were long and pale, and the large scars in her thigh from some long ago battle against Magneto and his band of merry fuckheads made me frown. I could see the patch of curly hair protecting her sex, and thought I was going go crazy staring at the small mole just to the left of the tiny poof of hair. I looked up over her belly to her breasts, and immediately ducked my head at the wave of shame I felt when I saw three small scars I’d left when I had stabbed her so long ago.

She reached down and caught my hand, squeezing it with a tiny quirk of her lips.

Right. I could feel like shit later. Right now, she was waiting to see what I’d do. My hands weren’t exactly soft when I bent down to slide my palm across her smooth skin but she shivered when I stroked up her thighs and over her stomach, up to her breasts but avoiding her nipples and her lower lips. I rubbed down her legs again, even massaged her feet, until she was utterly relaxed and moaning a little as she twitched on the bed. I shifted my weight on the mattress and kissed her ankle, then the back of her knee, pulling her legs wider so I could see the pink folds of her inner lips. I kissed her inner thigh, biting a little and sucking at the skin and she shivered, holding her legs open for me. I kissed up her thighs, licking at the wetness I found there, then concentrating on that for awhile. I arranged her legs so she was still completely open, but more comfortable, with one leg stretched out and one bent over my shoulder.

I teased her still, blowing cool air over her. Her scent was stronger here, and I was impatient to taste, even with as much as I wanted to draw this out. She’d missed so much by not being able to be simply touched in so goddamn long, I couldn’t help myself by indulging a little. Eventually though, I leaned in and licked a broad stripe with the flat of my tongue from the inside of her folds all the way down over the tight little bud of her ass, and back up.

She jumped, and gasped, and I looked up the line of her body to check that she didn’t want me to stop. Her warm, brown eyes were wide open, and she was biting her lip. I did it again, licking and licking, cleaning up where she’d gotten wet, only to have her get even more wet, between my mouth and her own juices. I still avoided her clit, watching as it slowly peeked out from behind its hood, changing the shape of my tongue from a flat brush to a point and licking little circles around the tiny bundle of nerves until she was quivering and moaning, too distracted to talk in my head again. After awhile,I started flicking the tip of my tongue over her clit, then down over her outer lips, swooping back and forth over the sensitive skin between her slit and her puckered hole. I enjoyed using my mouth, and licked around each opening, both with the flat of my tongue and the tip, so that she was almost shuddering before I’d even gotten inside her. When I did start to use my fingers, she actually cried out, the sound bouncing around the slowly darkening room.

Talk about music to my ears. As a reward, I thrust my tongue inside of her, as deep as it would go and she sucked in a shocked breath, muscles tensing. When I started to rub the area outside her clit with the tip of my finger, she came with another gasp and a squeak.

I stopped for a moment, giving her time to breathe again before I started back with my tongue, lapping up all the wetness I could find. Eventually though, the leg on my shoulder kicked me impatiently, and I gave in, sliding one finger, then two inside of her, moving my mouth so that it was directly on her clit. I licked, then sucked at the little bud, slowly starting to fuck her with my fingers.

“Logan!, Aw, god, Logan . . .”

I couldn’t help the small burst of satisfaction at the way her voice had lowered, the southern drawl becoming more pronounced. I wanted to see if I could make her come again, and while before was all teasing touches and exploration, this time was me concentrating on getting her off, on making her feel good.

She was so tight around my fingers that I could feel the little flutters as the muscles tightened and loosened. I flicked my tongue again over her clit, faster and faster as she cried out over and over, straining towards my mouth.

When I curled my fingers up towards her stomach, I wasn’t sure if I was on the right track or not until she froze.

“Yeah?” My own voice was a wreck as I checked that she was okay, pressing against the spot where the tissue felt slightly different.

“What... what is. . nnnngggghhhh .”

She grunted as she came again, and I moved to catch the burst of salty sweet fluid that flooded my mouth, making a mess over my lips and chin. There was so much, I felt drenched in her.

“Christ, you taste good.” Marie used her leg to pull me closer, and I could hear that her heartbeat was going crazy. She licked dry lips and I pulled away with a kiss on her tummy, padding to the bathroom to get her a glass of water. “You okay, darlin’?”

Marie drank the water, then opened one eye, raising her eyebrow. “I think so. Pretty sure I forgot my name there for a minute.” She leaned over and set the water aside, then yanked me unceremoniously to the bed on top of her. We both knew that I was controlling my fall more than anything, but my cock did bump against her thigh and Marie leaned up to kiss me, faltering for a moment as she tasted herself on my lips.

“Can. . . I Um. Can I try something else?”

“You know you can.”

She ducked her head and pushed me onto my back, climbing so that she was on top of me. Her breasts were heavy, the nipples still peaked and I leaned forward without really thinking about it to kiss and lick, cupping each one and rubbing. This we’d done before and she liked it just as much this time, her head falling back and throat working as she moaned.

I was distracted from her pink nipples when I felt her bump her sex over mine, and I stopped, pulling away with an effort.

“Wait. . . wait a sec. I bought some condoms, but they’re in the kitchen.”

She thought for a second, teasing the both of us by rubbing the wet head of my cock against her clit. I moved my hands to her sides, and then her hips, gritting my teeth. “I don’t want you to use them.”

I admit, I probably looked about as far from sexy as possible with my mouth hanging open like that.

“I’m not gonna get pregnant, and last time I liked feeling you.. Uh. Finish, inside of me. I could smell you and feel it from when you’d--”

I interrupted her words, kissing her into silence before I came right there, like some kid. I wanted to argue- but she knew what she wanted. If she wasn’t worried about me gettin’ her pregnant, and since I couldn’t get diseases, and she’d only been with me. . .

“You’re sure?” I frowned. “This seems like the plot to a bad romance novel.”

“I want you inside me, Logan.” She wiggled a little and I took her weight on instinct, floored by the simple need and honestly of her words.

She watched where we were connected as I lowered her body down, slowly. I might have stretched her with my fingers, but she’d come hard enough to tighten up, and no fucking way was I ever gonna hurt her again. I watched her face as she took me into her body, listening for any sign that she was in any sort of pain.

“God, you feel so good,” she breathed, looking at me as I slid all the way inside of her. “I love that you can hold me.”

I swallowed hard.

I lifted her slowly, and slowly slid her back down onto my cock, reaching from her hips to her ass, and taking hold of the firm globes. I had to plant my feet on the bed so that I had the leverage I wanted, and she moaned at the slow, inching pace.

I tightened my pelvic muscles, and felt my cock move inside of her and she looked up at me again, leaning in to kiss me. The scent of her was still strong; between the hair on my face being damn near drenched. I stroked up from her ass, up her back, and up over her shoulders, down over her breasts and and back around, lightly stroking in the crease between the cheeks of her ass. I moved her again, slowly, Christ. So, slowly that I had to tighten my grip so that I wouldn’t just start fucking into her.

Marie pulled away from the kiss, smirking a little. “I’m beginning to think you like my butt.” She gasped as I pulled all the way out, then held her there for a second before slowly, slowly, lowering her down again.

I shrugged. I liked everything, but yeah. I did.

She arched her back so that I could get more than a handful, then grabbed my hands, twisting my fingers with hers so that I didn’t hold her weight anymore. We both gasped- her at the sudden full feeling, me at the sudden tightness around my cock. She started to move so that I almost came all the way out before she plunged back down, taking over the rhythm and fucking me.

“Marie. . .” I moaned her name and she jerked her gaze up to mine again, pulling my face to her for a kiss. I thrust up and she thrust down and that. . .

We were lost to it for awhile. Just sweat, and moans, and the feel of my cock being strangled by her tight, wet, heat. I moved my hand so that I could finger her clit while I fucked up into her, or she fucked down on me- and she was so slippery that my thumb missed the first time I tried to touch her.

I was close, and struggling not to just come. I could feel her trembling on top of me, the muscles inside of her fluttering as I pushed her into another orgasm. I had to grit my teeth I was so close. I waited as she got her breath back, holding her weight as she collapsed against me, sweaty, her heartbeat thundering between us. She wrapped her arms around me and I thought it was for a hug until she started whispering.

“That night that you were locked in the cage you bent me over and took me from behind and I was so shocked, Logan, so wet for you.”

I froze, eyes widening as she continued.

“Your cock was so thick I felt you for days. I touched myself, tried to get off to the feel of you inside of me, but it didn’t feel the same. Not like this. Not like you’re just a little too big for me. . . Don’t you. Don’t you want to come inside me, Logan?”

I think I was gonna have a fuckin’ heart attack.

I was moving before I quite realized I was doing so, twisting so that she was on her back on the bed, I slid out and plunged back inside, loving the way her body arched as my cock slid against all the sensitive places inside of her.

She cupped her breasts again and looked up at me, lazily flicking her own nipples with her thumbs. I stared down at her dumbly, all thoughts I’d had of stretching this out so she came once or twice more flying out of my head. She was still so wet that our bodies made a squelching noise as I started to move, greedily taking what her body offered. When she reached down and fingered her own clit, staring up at me with a little smile, I lost whatever tenuous grip on whatever control I had.

It took five, maybe six thrusts before I was coming, shoving my cock so deep that I bumped up against the very end of her. As though from very far away, I heard myself roar out something, her name maybe, and felt her come again. I kept fucking into her, a little faster as I kept coming, feeling the tightness of her muscles pull me back in before I collapsed on top of her, completely spent.

She made a startled ‘oof!’ sound at my weight, but when I started to move, she wrapped her arms and legs around me, keeping me close.

“Not yet,” she whispered.

My throat was tight. I did shift so that I wasn’t crushing her, but I held her tightly as I dared, hearing our heartbeats slow so that they beat in sync. I stroked her back, along her spine, and yeah over her ass, and back up- a continuous circuit. We were silent as I softened inside of her. I couldn’t think of what to say, and she just seemed interested in cuddling closer.

I did get up once, under very sleepy protests, to get a cloth to wash the both of us so that we didn’t wake up feeling uncomfortable, and after she’d fallen asleep once more to turn the crock pot down to low and bank the fireplaces so that she would stay warm, but I couldn’t bear to be away from her too long. I had the sheet and the old quilt that someone had made by hand in town that I’d found I loved more than what was probably good for my badass image, and covered the both of us up.

Once I finally relaxed, and let myself take in the mixed scents of the two of us together, the solid weight of her beside of me, and the warm haven of our cocoon of blankets, I was out like a light.

****

I’m not sure who woke up first. I was aware of feeling warm, and comforted, and not alone. I felt Marie’s hand brush against my forearm, from where I was spooned up behind her, and made a sleepy sort of mumble as I traced the underside of the breast closest to my hand with my thumb. It must have gone on for awhile while we were asleep, because I was fully hard, and when she nudged back against me, opening her legs slightly, I slid into her so perfectly, I wasn’t entirely sure if I wasn’t still dreaming.

I usually wasn’t as fond of fucking side by side, but whatever this was? Wasn’t fucking. Marie moaned low as I bottomed out, and I slid one hand onto her tummy, petting it. The other I slid slowly up to cup her breast, tightening slightly when I felt the hard pebble of her nipple in my palm. I didn’t thrust, and she didn’t grind down on me. My cock was so hard, and she was so tight and wet that the act of not moving was arousing in and of itself. I bent my neck and grazed my teeth over her shoulder, moving up to suck a kiss on the column of her neck.

Marie gasped at that, and I felt her inner muscles flutter as she tightened in reaction. Lazily, in absolutely no rush, I moved my hand slowly down from her tummy to pet her curls, moving so that I could finger her clit. Even that was slow, small circles on and around the little nub, until she was leaning into the pressure of my finger, and pushing back slightly onto my cock with little gyrating movements of her hips.

I kept up the pressure on her nipple, and moved my mouth on different places that I could reach on her neck, awake enough now to start rocking my hips to meet her rhythm. I felt her nails in my forearm, as she shook from the intensity of her orgasm, and the tight, grasping heat of her, the intimacy of just. . . waking up like this sent me crashing after her, coming almost without meaning to do so.

We didn’t talk. We didn’t need to. I shifted slightly so that my arm wouldn’t fall asleep, and she murmured as she shifted slightly to move closer to me. The fireplace put out a low glow, and I heard the wind outside, but other than that, the only sound was our heartbeats as we fell back asleep, curled together like two halves of a whole.

*******

Marie’s stomach growling woke both of us up.

I flinched away from the sunlight, then curled onto my side. For a second, I didn’t know what month it was, but the sunlight was so bright that I had to squint to glance at clock then rolled my eyes. It was already three pm. We’d slept for over twelve hours. I set my head back down onto the pillow and stared at the woman in front of me.

“Hi,” Marie grinned at me.

“Hi.” I couldn’t help the probably completely goofy smile on my face. I felt rested, relaxed, and yeah, a bit hungry.

Marie opened her mouth again, only to have her stomach growl even louder and she shut it, blushing a little and laughing.

“I suppose I should feed you.” I bent forward to kiss her nose, then flung the covers off of her and onto the floor, just to be a dick. She gasped, curling into a little ball for warmth.

I walked naked to the window and shut the inner blinds, so that the sun bouncing off the show wasn’t piercing directly into my eyes. “Come on then. You want a shower, or fo-- whoa !” Marie sat up with her arms crossed over her naked breasts, and for once (and you really have to believe just how godawful this was) I barely noticed her naked body.

She’d gone to bed with hair that was sexily mussed, wet and clinging to everything.

She woke up with probably the worst case of bedhead I’d seen in at least this century.

Make that the last two centuries. Jesus fuck, for a second there I was afraid I was going to be attacked.

You are so gonna regret that. You won’t know when, and you won’t know where. . .

My grin just widened as I turned to head for the shower to make sure she had all the stuff I’d bought yesterday, then I double checked that the water heater hadn’t frozen while I was curled up, dead to the world. Everything looked good, so I continued on into my kitchen, stoking the fires as I went and adding wood as needed.

The stew was done, and I stirred it a little thoughtfully, looking around at the rest of my house. It struck me then, that I felt. . . content. Something very close to happy. It made me immediately distrust the feeling. But I loved hearing Marie singing a little off-key in the shower, and loved the way she got the words wrong to the song and didn’t give a shit, and loved---

Oh.

Oh, shit.

On autopilot, I put the lid back on the stew and got some ingredients out of the pantry for some drop biscuits. Nothing too fancy, but I needed to do something with my hands, and it was either this or go attack some trees with my claws. I couldn’t freeze to death, but I still didn’t want to go out in the Northern Canadian winter, with my naked tackle bare to the wind.

I swallowed again, hard, looking blankly in my fridge for milk. I had a small stash of logs inside the house, and still feeling weirdly blank, I sliced a couple of the larger pieces in thirds, so that I wouldn’t burn my biscuits.

I mixed everything and popped them in the stove. I turned to the sink and did the few dishes I’d messed up with making the biscuits, still full of nervous energy.

Love. Of course love, and obvious. That’s the feeling of waking up with her in my arms, no rush but to make her feel good, comfortable enough to sleep with her so close. Putting a word to everything felt like a puzzle piece clicking into place, but it terrified me. I’d struggled with this before, and it hadn’t worked out well. The Professor had wept openly when he broke down the barriers that Stryker had put in place, with chemicals and torture so that I couldn’t remember my life before. Afterwards, I remembered Mariko, and Itsu, and our unborn child. I had gone away for awhile, to lick my wounds in peace, and it wasn’t until Charles had gently nudged me back into a working part of the X-geeks that I was able to put aside some of my guilt and regret enough to function.

The fact remained that any woman I’d been with was vulnerable. I’d lived as long as I had, and would outlive anyone in my life. No matter how much I. . . love them, or want them, or need them. . .

...I always end up alone.

I could tell the biscuits were done by their smell, and bent over to take them out, pushing away the stupid emotions. I was getting a bit ahead of myself here. She was young, she was beautiful, and for right now, she wanted to be here. Tomorrow might be another thing entirely.

“Smells good.”

I was so far into my head that I actually jumped. I whirled, keeping in my claws only because I could smell the coconut scent of her shampoo and the minty fresh breath and her own sweet, perfect scent. She stood there in a pair of my sweatpants and the hoodie I’d bought her, hair twisted into a knot on her forehead.

“Oh, yeah, well. Best eat up. Here, have a seat. You warm enough?”

She nodded, and I smiled to see the ridiculously ugly granny slippers on her feet. Ugly they may be, but I bet that they were warm as hell.

She sat on the bench I’d made, curling her feet up in front of her so that her chin rested on her knees. It was a position I’d seen her in a hundred times, and it was no less soothing after the world-rocking realization from a few minutes ago. She watched me calmly as I scooped up some stew for the both of us, and served the biscuits and some butter onto the little table. I started to sit, remembered silverware, and got back up to get it. I started to sit again, remembered that she probably wouldn’t want my naked ass all over the furniture, and went to put on a pair of shorts.

I loftily ignored her smirk when I finally made it back to the table.

“Dig in.”

I saw her frown a little worriedly at me, but the food distracted her quickly enough. She started eating daintily, but god knew when she’d last eaten something more substantial than a granola bar. She wolfed it down, then got up and got another bowl, bringing the crockpot to the table. We both ate hugely of everything, and the silence wasn’t pointed, or strange, but comfortable.

She stood up while I was finishing the rest of my stew, and started washing dishes. We hadn’t talked in quite awhile, and I found that I didn’t know what to say. Feeling out of sorts, I got up and started drying.

“So. . . what happens next?”

I stole a glance at her out of the corner of my eye. “Well.” I dried off the inside of the crock pot. “After that feast, I think you’re gonna want a nap.”

“Hm. I know the days and nights are a little weird with the amount of sunlight, but isn’t it going to be dark soon? I’m not tired enough for a nap, but. I have a couple of things I need to do. Email Ororo and Jubes. I don’t suppose you have an internet connection?”

I raised an eyebrow and walked over to the bookshelf, pulling out the laptop case.

“How the hell do you---”

I shrugged. “Mobile satellite connection. Beast insisted.” Marie’s lips twitched, and I realized that I was quickly losing any aloof, techno-deficient status I might have once had. “What? I had to spend my money on something. Let me just set up the power. Should be okay- it’s another clear day.”

Marie just shook her head, smiling a little.

“While you do that, I’m gonna take care of some things outside.”

Namely- the realization I’d recently come to, but she didn’t need to know that.

“Okay.” She crossed over to me, stood on her tiptoes, and kissed me softly on the lips. I kissed back, something deep within more pleased than I knew how to articulate at the fact that she had initiated our kiss.

It only took a few seconds to go to the bedroom and grab a pair of sneakers, then I got the hell out of there. Since everything, I hadn’t had the chance to just run. Not since… since… well, shit. I couldn’t remember the last time.

I left her connecting to the satellite, and took off. The sneakers would get wet, and there was a good chance I would test my reflexes on the ice as to whether I’d bust my ass or not, but the freedom of just… going was too addictive to just let go.

I probably should have stretched, but instead I just. . . ran.

I didn’t notice the cold. I popped my claws so that I could swipe the occasional branch out of my way, and made sure to keep to the game trails so that no well-meaning traveler went to the local Constable about the half-wild crazyman running through the woods.

I startled a few beaver, and a moose gave me a filthy look, but other than that, there was nothing for miles and miles. I took refuge in the feel of my heartbeat, of the sweat freezing on my face, of the way my muscles trembled after I turned back around after the tenth or eleventh mile.

I wish I could say that I came to some grand realization, or some kind of ‘a-ha’ moment, but at the end of my exercise my mind was blissfully blank. The worry that had dogged me since waking up all those weeks ago with the scent of Marie on my skin was gone, and I was just. . .

. . . happy? Was that it?

I nodded, like some sort of schmuck. Yeah. Happy just about covered it.

I was sweaty and a little ripe when I walked back inside. I made it about three feet before I stopped short, three things becoming very clear, one after another:

         The first was that I could smell the faint bite of the chemicals from the hot tub in the air.

         The second was that Marie had left a website open (although she’d disconnected the satellite internet) to what was some kind of overly artsy boudoir photograph of a woman bent over what looked like a couch, the man behind her clearly fingering her in  both holes, fingers slick in the black and white light of the picture.  I froze, staring at it, Marie’s smirky sounding ‘I’m beginning to think you like my butt, ’ ringing in my ears.

         The third was that a small splash from my hot tub room clued me into the fact I had a warm, wet, naked woman waiting for me.

I debated briefly whether or not to take another shower, but quickly figured aw fuck it. It’s my tub before I did an about face and walked into the room.

She’d turned on the defogger, and the glass was perfectly clear. Had I come home from my run in a slightly different direction, I would have seen her relaxing in the tub.

She’d found some of my emergency candles and lit them, having dragged my small nightstand into the room. She’d thoughtfully put some towels near the door, and sat there on one of the carved seats so that the jets hit her back and feet.

She looked utterly relaxed, and completely content.

I could move silently even in the wet sneakers, but I brushed against the door on purpose so I wouldn’t startle her.

“Hi, sugah.”

God, I fucking loved it when she called me that. I rolled my eyes at myself and dipped one of the towels in the water. I wiped off most of my sweat before tossing it back towards the bathroom. 

The tub was designed with two different level seats. She sat on the longer one. It had a little safety bar, but she had used it to hook her feet so that they didn’t float up with the buoyancy of the water.

I slid into the water across from her, hissing a little at its heat.

She opened her eyes and smiled at me and my stupid fucking heart melted all over again.

Marie swung her legs down and walked towards me, straddling my thighs. She didn’t go in for a kiss, and it wasn’t even particularly sexual, but she did wrap her arms around my torso in a hug, resting her forehead on my shoulder as I slowly wrapped my arms around her.

“Charles and Erik have been quiet.”

I raised my eyebrow, surprised a little that she’d bring them up. “Yeah? That a problem?” She shook her head silently, and I waited a few minutes, before tilting her head up with my finger on her chin. “Darlin’?”

“Mm. I know. No, it’s not a problem. I uh. Have a feeling I know what they’re up to. Just after all of that stuff with the Shadowbeast and Jean, and hell. Everything . . . it makes me feel. . . like. . . like. . .”

“Like you’re the town bicycle and everyone gets a turn?”

She snorted a laugh and kissed me quickly on the lips. She was so easily affectionate, and I enjoyed it, as much as I told myself that it was all temporary.

“You frowned just then. What’s wrong? Onion breath?”

I shook my head. “Nah. Nothing. Just thinking.”

She was quiet, for about five minutes.

“Thinkin’ about what? Uh. . . what I left you on the computer?” She sounded a bit nervous.

I leaned down and captured her lips with mine. “No. I told you, I’m pretty open to anything that makes you feel good, but if you can’t say it, I won’t do it.” I could actually feel the heat of her blush against my shoulder. I waited a beat, seeing if she’d say anything. When she didn’t, I shook my head. “No. It’s really nothing to do with that. That? Whatever you were looking up then? I’ll experiment with you in any way you want. Gotta do something to keep you around.”

I was trying for levity, but I knew I missed by a mile when she leaned back so that she was sitting on the top of my knees, turning so that she wasn’t straddling me.

Shit.

Marie cocked her head, body language fairly screaming nervous anxiety. “Logan? Am I wearing out my wel--”

“No! No, of course not. You have to know that you have a home here, whenever you need one. It’s just. . .” I wasn’t used to feeling so insecure about something. It gave me enough of a jolt that I could answer her. “You’re gonna leave.”

Putting it out there like that was terrifying. She opened her mouth, and I brought my hand up to cover it, knowing that if I didn’t get this out now, I never would. “Having you here, having you safe, and here has been. . . everything. I know it’s a temporary thing before you go back to the X-Geeks, and I know you have to feel adrift, but the fact that you trust me enough to be here after everything...”

I felt her mouth move behind my hand. I gave my head a little shake, speaking a little faster. “The thing you saw on my face was me realizing how temporary all this has to be.” I took a deep breath. “I love you. Or am in love with you.” She made a shocked sound behind my hand, but I bulldozed on. “And I’m over two hundred years old. I’m gonna enjoy whatever you want to give me. And I’m grateful for it, god knows I am, but--”

The feel of her lightly taking my healing shocked me into silence. This jolt was harder than before when she'd shown me that she had control of her mutation, although less than the first time when she'd almost drained me dry. More of a slap to my face than a punch to the dick. She stopped, and I slumped a little, noticeably tired before my own healing kicked in for a little pep of energy.

“I’d have to check with Charles to be sure of the theory, and nothing is certain of course, but Logan, if your healing keeps you young and makes you live longer, what makes you think that me borrowing it won’t do some version of the same?”

I blinked, swallowing hard, beginning to glean the possibilities. My throat felt tight.

“The healing didn’t get rid of any scars I had before, and left me a tiny mark instead of huge scars from your accident when I was dumb enough to wake you up when you were sleeping. It’s a guess, but I should live longer than normal, too.” She waited for a beat. “What. . . “ She ducked her head, looking vulnerable. “What makes you think that I wouldn’t want to spend every minute of every hour I can with you?”

I clenched my fists under the water, where she couldn’t see. I knew better than to get my hopes up. I wasn’t a ‘hopeful’ kind of guy. Shit like that never seemed to work out the way I wanted it to, and after awhile, I learned to stop hoping.

Marie reached up and pressed two fingers against my frown, turning the corners so I would smile. I pulled my head away and frowned more deeply. This wasn’t a goddamn joke.  Her hand dropped into the water and she laced her fingers with mine, squeezing gently; an apology.

“You saved me when I was sixteen. I would have starved, or murdered someone accidentally if you hadn’t been there for me to stow away with. You saved me again, and again, and again.” She took a deep breath, moving her gaze to capture mine.

“Logan, I love you.”

I shut my eyes, the lump in my throat becoming too hard to swallow properly. Blindly, I pulled her to me, and she wrapped her hand around my shoulders, squeezing me with her legs in a full-body hug.

I don’t think I could have said anything if someone had paid me. I brushed my lips over her forehead, and we sat there in the tub, the water and steam making everything seems surreal. But I knew it wasn’t. I could still hear her words, rocketing around my brain.

I honestly don’t know how long we sat there, wrapped around each other. I was calm in a way that I hadn't been in awhile. Like before, there was no need to talk. We were comfortable just like this. I for one was all talked out. I think I'd hit my quota of emotional angst for at least the next year or so.  I do remember hearing her gasp in shock, and my eyes popping open to see light from the Aurora Borealis dancing over her naked skin, catching on the droplets on her shoulders and arms, reflecting in the bubbles of the tub.

“Logan, oh my god. Look! Look! ” Marie pulled away from me to point at the sky, as though I could possibly miss it.

Night had fallen, and through the glass enclosure, I could clearly see the Lights. Greens and blues and purples and some shades I didn’t even have names for shimmered above us. I’d seen them before of course. That’s part of the reason I’d built all this- the view was my own version of peace. 

“That’s so beautiful,” she whispered, awed.

I looked right at her when I responded. “Yeah. Beautiful.” I moved through the water, needing her mouth tangled with mine.

Marie’s delighted gaze flickered from the sky to my face before smiling a little shyly.

I’m not always the most emotionally savvy of people, but I saw a lot of things in that smile. I saw her love for me. I saw that I’d built this house around the person I’d wanted to make my life with, without knowing it at the time; oblivious to what and who awaited me. I saw reflected back at me the cautious hope and the gaining certainty that finally. . . after so many forevers. . . I’d found someone who made me. . .

...who made me feel.

 

 

 

TBC

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