Ooooooooh. I like it. Shit Hits Fan, film at 11. You juggled the different viewpoints well. Only thing that didn't quite ring true to me was Gambit's dialogue--he quite didn't sound like the Cajun to me.

Author's Response: I do tend to like \"shit hits fan\" type chapters :D Seems I can\'t write one where the shit doesn\'t hit the fan! Re Gambit, I made a bit of a boo boo there. I actually wrote the dialogue bare (without the Cajun trimmings) for a reason, and had a para about how she was surprised by that, and how he hadn\'t used his \"chere\" and the \"Remy this, Gambit that\" thing. And how that revealed that he was putting on a show, disguising how he really felt. But I discarded that because it became less important as the context developed, and now the dialogue sounds wrongish. Doh! Just assume he was upset, and not himself!

A supplicant at the temple of Logan. I like it. :)

One thing caught my eye: Logan's hands are cuffed to the chair throughout, right? How does he reach out to fast-forward the security footage? Or did I miss a line where Rogue uncuffed one hand? (Your stories pull me along so well that it's possible I missed a phrase someplace.)

And as for Mystique... the plot thickens. I like that you kept her as Rogue's mother but switched it over to a biological relationship. And Magento as the father...! That just adds a whole dimension of messed up.

I'm eager to see the next installment.

Author's Response: Oh, sharp eyed readers! Nope, you missed nothing. I thoroughly screwed up. It seemed a good idea at the time, and I simply was too focused on having fewer typos this time to pick up on big things, like Logan\'s magical ability to escape handcuffs :P Or perhaps he used his third hand :D Re Mystique and Magneto ... I just saw First Class yesterday, and now I\'m really eager to play with that Xavier/Mystique/Magneto dynamic some more.

Yep, definitely scarred. In a good way!

You just keep cranking up the tension, and I keep coming back because it's just that good. Loved the glimpse inside Mystique's mind and life.

So, uh... I guess that only leaves one culprit? (She said, uncertainly.) Unless there's someone lurking offscreen whom we haven't met yet. In which case I might have to fling fruit. ^_^

Author's Response: If its any help, I hate simple. I don\'t do simple, or clearcut, or even right and wrong. And I never, EVER do obvious ....

Diamonds, you say? ;)

Happy to be reading a new chapter. You just keep cranking up the tension. Nice!

Author's Response: So, you don\'t LIKE being hit over the head with a hammer? :P

Wow. The tension here is amazing. The engines are starting to vibrate in advance of the huge kaboom, aren't they? Very well done.

Author's Response: Thank you! Kaboom is coming, that\'s for sure. I\'m hoping to wrap this up in chapter 25, so ... brace positions!

I am intrigued by your ideas and wish to subscribe to your newsletter. *clicks Add to Favorites*

Author's Response: I am pleased by your interest and more so for your subscription. *gives Super Tight Hug*

Fie on that restaurant! Fie! Withholding Rose's eggrolls is weaksauce, people, now come on. Maybe you can channel Logan for just long enough to ask for what you paid for? Because me, I am too old for that sh*t (she said, at the ripe age of almost-40).

Also, you're welcome. ;)

Author's Response: I know, right?! >shakes head sadly< I\'m glad you understand my pain--you\'re much less of a wimp than I am. :~D Thanks....Oh, mess. That would make an excellent bunny for a foof fan, wouldn\'t it? Of course, Logan would be all, \"I got your eggroll right here, Lady.\"

Ooh, the plot thickens. Making us wait for the progression of the relationship, however, is cruel, cruel, cruel.

Author's Response: I know. Quite the heartless monster, aren\'t I? Almost as bad as your favorite restaurant forgetting to give you your favorite eggrolls which you paid seven dollars for, and that\'s like an hours worth of pay and you\'ve been craving them all week but you\'re neither snobby or brave enough to walk back up there and ask for them....can you tell I\'m eating dinner now? Anyhoodles, thank you. You\'re awesome and I\'m grateful for your continued interest....I really wanted those eggrolls...

Nope, Rose, no Tylenol needed. As always, I love your use of language and imagery... "an impertinent bird" and "cold and shuttered, blockaded like a fort under heavy fire" were wonderful. I also love the way so much is unsaid and unknown to Logan but is clear to the informed reader. Dramatic irony, yo.

As for the delay in posting, shpff. Stuff gets posted when it gets posted. I can't understand anyone who loses interest in a story just because it doesn't get completed on some hypothetical schedule. If it's worth reading, it's worth reading... and your stuff is.

People who complain about "late" posting of stories that are completely free and which the authors are sharing for the love of the telling and the craft... those people annoy me. (I actually have a rude term for them which I will not employ here, lest I call down the wrath of Devil Doll. ;) )

Thank you! :)

Author's Response: Shpff? Might be the most beautiful unheard sound in the whole world. Thank you, thank you dear girl. This was a wonderful thing to start my day with........Btw, I\'ve had this strange craving to reread the Harry Potter books. I think its because I finally realized where your username comes from. >slaps forehead<

Nah, no need to feel silly. It's not really very obvious, is it? ^_^

Hmm. The bare bones of the plotline have some interest to them, but I'm sorry to say that the characterizations don't ring true to me at all. Nor does the dialogue; when I read your dialogue, I just don't hear the movieverse actors speaking in the least. Finally, I would highly suggest that you find a beta reader. I know your story has the warning, but the very large number of typos and misused words (there/their/they're) is quite distracting.

Author's Response: To Baybelletrist,\r\nThank you for reviewing to let me know what your thoughs are about my story. You have given me something to think about as I reread over the piece. I\'m sorry to hear the story is not to your taste. Thank you for at least giving it a chance. I\'d also like to thank you for bring the typos to my attention. I am going to try, and be more careful in the future.

As I once remarked to Rose, I am intrigued by your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter. ;) That is to say, I like what I've seen so far and am eager to see the next installment.

Author's Response: Ha, my DH says that all the time. :-) We are big Simpsons fans...we even had Homer and Marge on our wedding cake instead of a bride and groom. :-)